This is almost exactly the same as my experience as well. My premiums are pretty high (like $500/month out of my paycheck) but when the time comes for the procedures it’s usually not too bad. One caveat, we have not had any large medical expenses except for a relatively minor outpatient surgery that my wife needed last year, bill was over $1000 but the hospital had an interest-free payment plan that let us break it up over the next 12 months with no early payment penalty, so we took advantage of that.

As another poster pointed out, the big issue is the emotional and mental toll of trying to sort things out if the slightest little thing goes wrong. You basically have to do their job for them in that case and can be exhausting.

Edit to add: as you can see in this thread, people’s expenses can vary wildly depending on a lot of factors. For my plan, even if we don’t hit our caps, there is typically still a ‘discount’ and ‘allowed charge’ that the insurance has worked out with the providers, so we still didn’t have to pay the ‘full’ amount of that surgery even though we didn’t hit our deductible or out of pocket. We’ve also been to the ER a couple times for our 7-year old and it’s typically been about $600 a pop for each. It is insanely complicated and I barely understand it all but just thankful the plan my employer offers seems decent.

everything you've listed is what you pay at the point of service. are your premiums covered 100% by your employer, or what?