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submitted 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) by thelastaxolotl@hexbear.net to c/chat@hexbear.net
 
 

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basically just a stream of consciousness that i havent proofread, also i have been reading the Grapes of Wrath lately so this probably rips off Steinbeck I think but whatever i appreciate anyone who reads and lets me know what they think


The soil is dry, drier than ever. Grass yellows, dirt hardens, and the hum of the summer is quieter than you remember. The summers you recall were lush and green, but now each is yellow, fields of yellow and brown, stretching on. In cities the parks are desperately thirsty, and the news features interviews with farmers, no longer fretting about inheritance tax, but about the sickness of their land. They express this in terms of lost revenue and fear of what will happen to their property, of course, but they know this is more than a fiscal downturn.

Still, few listen. As the soil dries and rivers thin, our attention is gripped by other matters. There's a war, for god's sake. The land may be dying, but what will happen if the Russians have it and not us? What about the Iranians? And anyway, we don’t need to listen to confirm what we already know in our hearts. This place is already a desert, but a domesticated one. We can push things a little further to carve out an echelon of comfort. We can install AC, like the Americans do.

The soil dries further. There are breaches in the walls that protect normality. There are threats of hosepipe bans; we are all angry at the water executives and their ill-gotten bonuses, so we determine to ignore these and feel self-righteous. But the thirst of all life is hard to ignore, as we are still animals, and we can sense it implicitly. A few are able to fully circumvent this instinct, having learned to do so long ago, and murdering their own humanity in the process.

Anxiety begins to build with each day that it goes on. Something is desperately wrong, more wrong than ever, but it is simply too big to say out loud. Somebody, in any case, must be doing something about this. Somebody must have their hand on the steering wheel. The thirst is no longer just in the soil and in nature but in you as well, driving you to check forecasts at an alarming rate. This grants a semblance of control over the situation – if you at least know precisely what is going on, then you can formulate a plan, or make predictions, or at least bear witness, which provides a drop of comfort.

Three years ago it was worse. Not in the spring, but in the summer, at least. It might not get as bad as that this year. There’s a chance, always. Thank goodness for the rain in May, or we’d be in more serious trouble! Yet, these well-used coping mechanisms do little to sate your thirst, and nothing will, except the rain, which you are desperate for, like everything else.

This is a lonely state of affairs. You may seek out fellow worriers on online forums or in scientific journals, but broadly society seems to move along as normal. A relative or a friend tells you that the weather has been lovely, and you do not disagree, not wanting to be awkward. You simply cannot express this anxiety while maintaining the image of a well-adjusted member of a well-adjusted society. You know you are not well-adjusted, and you know for sure that the society isn’t, either, but that is little comfort.

It comes, eventually, perhaps all at once or perhaps in showers. The weather that was a frustration nine months ago is now a wondrous event, and nature’s desperate need is quenched. Raindrops on the window take on a marvellous quality. Perhaps the drought will abate, or perhaps not, but today there is momentary salvation, and for that you are thankful. Yet, you know that this will not last. This will only get worse. The prognosis is deadly. This disease will not be cured or reversed in the slightest.

Your own disease will continue to develop in tandem, isolating you further from those who do manage, something you cannot understand. The old maxim about being poorly-adjusted to a profoundly sick society is not comforting. You wish you could reverse the course of events. You wish to go back to the world that no longer exists. But you cannot. Events are in motion that dwarf all of us, and you know this well. Control is a myth that you wish you still believed in.

The soil, now moist, begins to dry again.

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There's a thread on reddit right now where, as usual, people are claiming that it's too easy to get disability benefits, all you have to do is say "I'm sad, I'm depressed," and you are instantly given benefits. Which is the complete opposite of reality. Someone wrote a response about how difficult it actually is to claim disability in the UK, and I think this response is brilliant and really shows just how hard it is. The response focuses specifically on mental health claims, but applying for physical health is every bit as difficult as this too:

Hi, Welfare Rights Adviser for over 10 years here, probably over a 1000 first tier tribunal appeals under my belt at this point, dozens of upper tier tribunal appeals also. I help clients with every aspect of a claim from start to finish.

Your second point could not be more wrong, and gets parroted on here like it's gospel by people who don't have a single clue about any of this.

You absolutely cannot just turn up and say "I have depression, give me money please ooh I'm so sad"... The way everyone talks on here makes it sound like the DWP response to that is, "well we can't just accuse someone of lying, they must be telling the truth, we have no choice but to give them infinite money and a car"

Someone with a mental illness wouldn't just have to fake it to a DWP assessor, they would have to fake it to multiple healthcare professionals throughout many years.

DWP can, and do, very frequently reject reported restrictions claimants have because there's no evidence. Often unreasonably so.

If you have no diagnosis they'll say go away you have no diagnosis

If you have a diagnosis they'll say go away you're only on a first line medication and not under a specialist

If you are under a specialist they'll say go away you have no history of self harm or suicide attempts

If you do have a history of self harm and suicide attempts they'll say go away that was 5 months ago you're fine now

If you tried to commit suicide yesterday they'll say, actually you managed to finish high school twenty years ago, that must have taken a lot of drive and motivation go away.

Last month I had a case up for a hearing where the appellant suffered from severe depression, and had been in receipt of PIP for 8+ years, with 4 reviews in that time. This time he was given 0 points despite having been sectioned twice since the last review as he was a danger to himself .

While waiting for a hearing he hanged himself from his bedroom door using the cord from his dressing gown.

I informed the DWP of this, expecting them to lapse the appeal, give him his old award back, and give his grieving family some money for a funeral with the backdated payment.

They refused.

Three months later we have the hearing, appellant is represented by his mum and dad who are in floods of tears the moment they walk in.

The hearing lasts 1 minute, in which the judge simply apologises to the family, and launches into an absolute tirade against the DWP (who wisely chose not to send anyone to this particular hearing) for ever stopping his benefits in the first place.

This is the reality, this is the system people on here are advocating should be made crueler to those with mental illness

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The gang's all here! They figured out how to attach GIFs lol

flattened-bernie being like "I sold your number to these people"

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Friday tunnel/trench day.

green stuff is tracer dye. I spent the morning identifying floor drains inside a 7-11. It's all fucking broken.

No time to dilly dally.

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If it isn't Zionazi freaks, anti-communist fascists, or dog-whistling Ukranazis it's few and far between you find someone who's into military stuff that isn't throwing up the roman salute.

Big shoutout to local hero @Tervell@hexbear.net for reminding me that not all mil geeks are blood and soil weirdos.

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She's an old trout who banged a married man, broke up the home of two little children and for that we need to show respect to her. And if you don't you'll be poked by her ladies in waiting and ordered to get up.

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pete

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My “roommates” and I have been staying at a motel for the last month, and we’re looking at transitioning to a more permanent solution, like a sublet or something.

They came into some money and they’re letting me stay with them.

One of them is going to start working again, doing handyman type stuff, and I’m going to help him—at first being like his secretary, until I get more physically fit, because right now it hurts to hold my arms above my head.

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It's quite a dialectical relationship, doncha think? thinking-about-it

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My guess is that they had an applicant with experience on the specific coffee roaster they have, or someone with less experience overall that they can pay less.

However, they did give me their personal contact info to hang out when I'm town and most importantly, I convinced them that all of the world records for "oldest dog" are fake.

This is one of the last chill industries left in the US lmao

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I just saw this story on reddit:

*A friend of mine had limited vision when he took a new role as production manager for an edible oils company. They even hired a "guide", to make sure he could get around the site safely.

His vision totally failed totally half way through his probation period...

The company medically retired him at full salary, for life...he was in his late 40's at the time.*

I was amazed to read about such a good employer, as my experience was starkly different. I'd worked for 16 years before going on disability benefits, most of that time as a carer for the elderly, but for the last 18 months I'd been working in a gym as I had fancied a change. I'd qualified as a fitness instructor, and during those 18 months had been promoted to personal trainer (meaning I got my own 1 on 1 clients), the boss had spoken to me about paying for me to get further qualifications, I got on well with my colleagues and never had any complaints about my work.

But I started cancer treatment. I carried on working at first, although I was tired and less chatty than usual. I also cut my working days from 5 down to 4. And began to need time off for hospital appointments. My boss started picking on me, constantly trying to find fault with everything I did. I wasn't being extroverted enough any more was the main complaint.

A man I had never seen before started hanging around the gym, watching me. One day my boss called me into the office and the man was there. My boss fired me. He told me this man who'd been hanging around had been undercover watching me and I wasn't outgoing or friendly enough any more, I wasn't being proactive any more, and I was fired. I asked, "Not being proactive in what way?" The boss couldn't give any concrete examples. He couldn't even give any real examples of me not being extroverted enough. He said people weren't happy with my work but couldn't give any examples of that either. And he'd seemed very happy and never had a complaint in all those 18 months.

It was absolutely clear to me that he no longer wanted to employ me because I was now ill, needed time off for hospital appointments and he was worried my condition would deteriorate further. In the UK you need to work in a place for 2 years before you get full employment rights, and he wanted to get rid of me before then. If he'd kept me on for 2 years and then I got even sicker and could work less and he fired me, I could claim unfair dismissal. So he was desperate to get rid of me before then.

And if I'd been there for 2 years before becoming ill, he'd have been obliged to make reasonable attempts to modify my work to enable me to keep working. And if he wanted to fire me he'd have to follow a fair dismissal procedure. By getting rid of me as soon as I became ill before 2 years had passed, he could just get rid of me, easily. However he got this man to watch me and say I wasn't doing a good job as a precaution anyway, so he'd have someone backing him up if I tried to fight it.

I was so upset by the unfairness I actually burst into tears and just left. I didn't fight it, I already had a cancer fight on my hands, I couldn't take on an employment fight too.

This is the reality of being ill or disabled, employers don't want you. You need time off and can't do everything a well, able bodied person can do. This is why it makes me so angry when people talk about cutting disability benefits, or making them harder to get and saying of the disabled "There must be some work they can do!" What work, where, and is there enough of this work to provide full time employment for millions of disabled people? No, of course not. Nobody wants to pay our benefits but they don't want to employ us either. They always want us to be someone else's problem. And if we end up homeless, they'll put spikes on benches and in doorways so we can't sleep there. Out of sight, out of mind.

Employers like the one in the reddit post are few and far between. There is so much talk in the UK about how the welfare state can't be sustained but what do they think is going to happen? I am truly worried we will see a return to workhouses and Dickensian slums. Children are already being starved at school: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c0k7dv1mnpvo

How long before they are sent down the mines again? Even the Nazis were kinder, I'd rather be gassed to death than impoverished to death. It's already hard enough to get and keep disability benefits in the UK, as anyone who has been following my posts knows. But it's difficult to stay in employment as a disabled person too when an employer will do anything to be rid of you at the first sign of illness. Just what are we supposed to do?

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My dad is 78 years old, and my mom turns 69 this year. My dad plans to work for another year because he "can't afford to retire". Here is their financial overview:

Assets

  • 401(k) and IRA savings totaling just under $2 million.
  • Total income of roughly $109k according to last year's IRS filing (including mandatory Social Security disbursements, despite not yet being retired, due to my dad's age) in a low cost-of-living area. Excellent health insurance through my dad's job.
  • Outright ownership our single-family home. No mortgages!
  • Full-ownership of two SUVs, each purchased new less than ten years ago. No auto loans!
  • ~Fifty acres of rural real-estate, including a mid-sized tractor and a giant metal barn/shed that is almost twice the size of our house, and has a loft. No mortgages on the property.
  • A sailboat.
  • ~$20k sitting in their checking account right now
  • ~$400k of (non-retirement) stock investments ALL IN ONE SINGLE GOLD MINING COMPANY!

Liabilities

  • ~$70k of credit card debt at ~30% APR (!?), which I just recently this week convinced my mom to pay off, after a year of begging and pleading.
  • ~$150k in student loans at ~7% APR in my mom's name which she took out on behalf of the educations for me and my two siblings (I also would have paid these off years ago if I had any say).

What's Wrong?

They choose to live in poverty (of sorts), to forgo basic necessities, and to let their home---which they've lived in for nearly forty years---rot in disrepair.

  • About half of the house's exterior paint has flaked off completely. The rest is "boiling" off.
  • Our roof leaks every time it rains because we have needed new shingles for maybe twenty years (IDK). The shingles are boiling and warped, just like the paint.
  • ~40% of the walls in the house are bare, unpainted drywall from half-finished renovations my dad started thirty years ago.
  • ~20% of the walls have drywall on only one side. The other side is studs with bare wires running through them.
  • ~30% of the flooring is literally the concrete foundation, also from half-finished renovations my dad started thirty years ago.
  • One window in one of the two guest bedrooms has been half-made of duck tape for the past twenty-five years, because it was broken and never replaced.
  • There are several inch-wide gaps in the hallway ceiling surrounding the drop-down ladder to the attic through which 130F air pours directly into the central AC intake.
  • Our one and only working shower broke last year---the water would only trickle out. Instead of calling a plumber, my dad just suffered with for nearly a month, because it was no biggie---it just took twenty times as long to take a shower is all.
  • I thought that the one nice thing we had in our home was a proper stovetope range hood that blows the air outside instead of recirculating it into the house. Yesterday I found out that ours has been blowing the greasy hot air into our attic (where they store belongings) for the past twenty years, because my dad hasn't yet finished its duct work.

Our energy bills are huge. Did I mention we live in swamp-ass Texas and it gets 110F for much of the summer? In the past forty years they haven't invested a dime in energy efficiency improvements. It gets worse.

About ten years ago, our central air conditioner (which was probably installed in 1975 and came with the house when they bought it) broke down.

Instead of shelling out the cash for a new central unit, they bought one of those horribly inefficient portable ones that attaches to the window via a long hose. This brought the indoor living room temperatures down to ~89F in the summer. My dad would sit on the couch in his Walter White tidey-whitey underpants, sweating, two fans blowing on him, complaining constantly about the summer heat. They used shitty window units in the bedrooms. When the shitty portable unit in the living room died after just two years, they replaced it with a slightly less shitty portable unit from another company.

We finally got a new proper central air conditioner to go with our existing central air infrastructure (!) three months ago, after much pleading, protesting, and shaming by me.


A Vignette

Last night, I interrupted my parents nightly Netflix binge to talk to Dad about the roof. I mentioned how it's a no-brainer which pays for itself by adding value to the home (their financial asset!), and that every day we go without a new one, more damage accumulates---which will cost even more to repair.

His reply has been echoing in my head ever since...

grillman "A new roof could cost almost $10,000. Where am I going to get that kind of money?"

My dad refuses to hire contractors, because there are none in existence that he "trusts" to do it right. That's why the paint is peeling. Because before painting the house, he plans to REBUILD the sides of the house with lumber and his own two hands. Because you don't want to paint a shitty house, right? His plan is to wait until he retires, and then just do everything.


Similarly, I talked to my mom days ago about how how a couple professional HVAC renovations totaling about one thousand dollars could drastically improve the airflow, efficiency, comfort, and noise level of our home.

You know what she said?

"Oh, no. I don't want to invest that much money into the house. We're not going to live here forever."

They do not communicate AT ALL. They are both living in the future in separate fantasy worlds.


My entire life I grew up thinking we were destitute, because *gestures around*, but mainly because my dad does nothing but complain about money and how everybody else is a rich doctor. My parents have been extremely cryptic and weird about finances for my entire life. My dad refused to tell HIS OWN WIFE his income for DECADES. The ONLY thing I knew about their financial situation until a few months ago (I'm 37) is that they had tens of thousands of dollars in credit card debt. This has caused me and my siblings incalculable anxiety and stress. I was in bed with depression for years, thinking we were going to be thrown onto the streets at any moment. My mom could only tell me "not to worry about it". Yeah, that helps.

Any mention of finances will launch my dad into the same fucking speech about how his income is "going to go down to almost half" when he retires---he basically guilts you for bringing up the subject, in a condescending tone. He is an extremely miserable, dour, joyless man who emits an energy field which doubles the cortisol levels of everyone in a ten meter radius. He is incapable of warmth and affection. He is short-tempered and belittles my mom. My mom puts up with all of it because she's an evangelical and Jesus told her that he will one day make my dad a Christian and a good person, basically. She told me that circa 1997.

I asked my mom why she has all of that money on the "roulette table" (extremely un-diversified, volatile investments). I asked her what in this world she wanted the money for... She said she wanted new underwear and a new couch. That's it. Oh, and she wants her family to be happy. Finally, she revealed the true reason: Jesus tells her when to buy and sell the gold company stock, and she will one day make SO much money on the stock market that my dad will have no choice but to see that God is real, and accept Jesus Christ into his heart as his Lord and personal savior (and make their life and marriage perfect, I guess). She can't imagine or articulate any big-ticket item that she actually desires, she just wants to be "rich". She doesn't want to spend the money she has RIGHT NOW to improve the lives of her family RIGHT NOW.

I am still unpacking the C-PTSD I accumulated from a childhood of extreme emotional neglect. BOTH of my siblings have been involuntarily hospitalized for schizophrenia that manifested in the past three years. During our childhood, my mom spent all day in bed asleep with depression, and my dad didn't know I existed, even though I was right in front of him the whole time. Neither of them have any social skills whatsoever. We ate family dinners at the table together in complete silence for eighteen years. I didn't even know that wasn't normal.

14
 
 

*and a couple hundred dollars

ive had some accounts on here where i detailed my situation more but long story short, i'm a brown queer who's long overdue on leaving an extremely triggering living situation in a southern state with increasingly hostile policies and a personal 0% success rate on finding meaningful friendships, community, or work. i've already tried moving to a big liberal city before and while it was better on some ends, i still was unable to make any meaningful connections or enough money that would have made the working just to live in a shitty room at the mercy of random sublandlords worth continuing for me. i also had a traumatic experience where someone scammed me out of a large sum of money, and the worst part of that whole ordeal wasn't even losing the money, it was the lack of emotional support afterwards.

anyways, after an antagonizingly long hiatus from society despite my best efforts to have even a crumb of a reason to keep hope and effort that i might find something that could give me a reason to keep going, i've decided that enough is enough, there's almost a 100% chance i won't find anyone likeminded enough here or an opportunity good enough to build towards freedom, and so i want to try vagabonding around before i give up entirely. i feel like i've tried every other possible option except meandering around the world so if i plan to call it quits i could at least do this and say hey i tried everything. i literally had 0$ for a while but i managed to sell an old guitar of mine which kickstarted this plan into fruition.

my question is have any of you ever done it without places to stay lined up, tons of savings (i have less than a grand), people to travel with, or a plan? i would love to hear from your experiences, particularly if you are a PoC.

i've been specifically thinking about getting a one way flight to portugal and then just very slowly make my way towards africa or asia from there. i've also thought maybe it would be smarter to stay in the country in hopes it could lead to more domestic opportunities, but it feels like the law would be more against me within the US. another option could be heading south through mexico to central and south america.

it's funny because the thing i crave so badly is stability and familiarity and being able to rely on and help and be helped i really just want to live a normie life like id even be willing to go back to wage slaving if there were people that cared about me. this plan feels like the complete opposite lol but if i don't do anything then i'm just guaranteed to get nothing

15
43
submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by Guamer@hexbear.net to c/chat@hexbear.net
 
 

I recently tried putting myself out there and started going to a weekly game night at a local game shop. I had been thinking about it for a long time, but one day after work I finally had the courage and went. I was super nervous that first night, felt very intimidated since by the time I got there the vast majority of people were already playing tabletop games I wasn't familiar with. But I met a nice table of a few people playing a more casual card game. They welcomed me and we had a good time.

We met once a month for the next 2 months. both times fun, they invited me to a friend group discord to help coordinate when we'd hang out. I was hopeful maybe this was the start of a new beginning for me.

I find out today that I was kicked from said Discord without any warning or reason given.

Confused, old feelings of friend rejection surfacing, I message the admin/"leader" of the friend group, let's call her X. To her credit, X actually responds and doesn't just ghost me. She claims I was kicked because I @everyone'd too much and it quote "made people uncomfortable".

I did it a total of 2 times, with a space of a month between, both times were literally "Hey, anyone wanna hang out this week? @everyone".

No warnings, no indication that I had made some unspoken internet faux paus, just immediate punishment.

I tried to explain my side and that I meant no harm and annoyance, and that now that I was actually made aware of the problem, I could act on fixing it. I explained that I'm autistic and that I mess up social cues alot as a result, all but begging for a 2nd chance, just not to be alone again.

But nope, mind was made up. She said as much and then promptly blocked me.

What gets me the most is: All she had to do was talk to me. Just shoot me a message saying "Hey can you please not @everyone", and it would've been resolved. That's it.

Looking back, there were some flags with X that she was a control freak and a wannabe "Queen Bee" of this group, that she wanted a monopoly on when and where we all hung out, for no one else to ever initiate besides her, that she maybe never really liked me to begin with and was waiting for an excuse to do something like this. But I gave her the benefit of a doubt because I wanted so, so badly to belong

I won't miss X, and would be fine never seeing her again, but I will miss the other people (I have no real way of contacting them now. I was still getting to know them while they've been friends with X significantly longer, so odds are they'd side with her regardless). I hope X and her group hang out elsewhere from now on, if for no other reason than to avoid me and the ensuing awkwardness.

All I've ever wanted, more than anything in the world, is a true-blue best friend group who I knew had my back 100% no matter what. No joke, I'd give up all my earthly possessions to have that, it would bring me that much joy and peace. But if there's a god, I guess he's just like "Fuck you, you don't get to have that".

This has been the latest in a line of recent failures to make new friends, something I've struggled with my whole life. And I get more and more discouraged every time. I feel so unwanted

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I am not shy when it comes to mentioning that out of my family (all Venezuelans), I am the only one that didn't fall for the alt-right Trump pipeline. I mean, very briefly in 2008-2011, I was a libertarian/ancap before that was a mainstream and quit when I found that the AnCap meet ups I was seeing online looked like white supremacist gatherings. Then Bernie came along, and I agreed with him, and I had to investigate Venezuelan socialism to square it away with my internalized opposition. So I did read Capital. I also read the UN and Treasury website on Venezuelan sanctions and realized why Venezuela is having such a difficult time. My brother, who was a Bernie-bro in 2016 has fallen with the alt-right. I cannot overstate how Hillary Clinton, the DNC, and pied piper strategy to run against Donald Trump has devastated the minds of Americans.

He was a Bernie bro, when Bernie got ratfucked. My brother also fell on hard times, he turned increasingly pessimistic and exacerbated his mental illness. His mishandled OCD – his therapist was terrible– led him to stay home and listen to more extreme right-wing content, he was struggling to pay off his student loans (which Joe Biden never canceled/pardoned). And he is now a libertarian/AnCap, Peter Schiff type, a silverbug, an absolute MAGA cretin and evangelical christian weirdo (we are Catholic). And because he is still struggling to find a decent job, applying to CBP.

I found this out recently when my mom called to ask for information, "because your brother is applying to join a federal government agency" and I told them I wouldn't not give them anything, they didn't already know. Come to find out he has taken a fitness test and will join the CBP.

This shit sucks man.

17
 
 

You would think if they had him dead to rights as being a Russian asset, there would have been... Anything about it anywhere.

Also, honorable mention: TACO seems to be old news after libs helped goad him into bombing Iran, so that's fun.

Can't wait for the next one!

18
 
 

Decided to make a sierpinski's tetrahedron as a first REAL project! I built a shitty angleiron workbench (with an old door ziptied onto it as the tabletop) before but I'm actually trying this time so it's different

170 welds completed so far crab-party !! So, only 346 left to go!!... doggirl-tears

This was a really good idea until I remembered how complex fractals are, like GIRL, DUH, fuck was I thinking hahaha

Its REALLY scuffed though, I'm talkin like using my stick welder to melt a half inch off the end off of the pieces I had precut to make it shorter so it will fit in the actual dimensions needed, I've been holding the smallest (~2") pieces with a wrench and holding it in place freehand. It's been a lot of fun so far, and I'm definitely improving as I go, I weld my welding stick to my stock way less often now, and achieve arc much more reliably too, which is cool to see my own progress within the project!

I hurt my shoulder a bit ago so I haven't been able to do much lately, but welding is pretty low impact in that I mostly just sit on a folding chair in my driveway next to my shitty workbench lol

Have some more views!

When it's done it'll look like this image I found on google

19
 
 

Idk if yinz remember but I posted about a year ago that I quit my job and moved back in with my parents while I reassessed what I wanted to be doing. My last job was so bad that I thought I wanted to completely switch careers. I know the person that replaced me there is already gone lmao.

After getting an ADHD diagnosis, medication, and therapy, I realized that it would be stupid to walk away from all my experience at this point. Not to toot my own horn but I'm literally one of the best coffee roasters in the US and I have the credentials and awards and shit to back that up.

All that said, I have my first interview trying to get back into the industry in the morning. I can't really say I'm that nervous, it's more excitement to finally have clarity to move forward. The thing that really sucks is that because there are so few people that do what I do, a new job almost always involves a move, and this would be a move to a new state I've never been to.

I'm not sure what I wanted out of this post but thanks for being a great community for me to shitpost in.

20
 
 

i'm halfway capable with this kind of thing, but not an expert. not really sure why it would be having this issue. thanks in advance for anyone that can give me some help <3

21
 
 

I've got a job interview in 10 hours! It's a merchandiser position for a beverage vendor. If I get this job, it will become my full-time job and my current full-time job would go part-time, as this would make me more money.

Basically, while it won't make me rich, this will finally give me the ability to afford to actually live and not just scrape by begging and borrowing.

I am anxious as hell.

Wish me luck, friends! I need this!

heart-sickle

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submitted 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) by Umechan@hexbear.net to c/chat@hexbear.net
 
 

What will be his legacy considering that he isn't so well known outside the UK? Will he be a failed gender neutral toilet, or a hidden gem of a gender neutral toilet?

23
 
 

Early June I got offered a badass job through their VISTA program that I was, and am still, really excited about.

The local org went as far as giving me a laptop and everything for it, but apparently Americorps hasn't approved them to get any VISTA people yet, so ive gotta return that shit now and just sit on my ass until anything further happens.

Cool cool cool. Luv 2 live in Amerikkka where I cant make a full time job out of helping people.

kitty-birthday-sad

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Fucking sucks, so fucking tired of this.

Definitely a lot of drawbacks but definitely the most adult job I’ve ever had. Really crushed because I’m feeling stupid because I saw it coming but I’m still unprepared.

Graduated into a recession that feels like it never ended. Never felt like I belong in the world of white collar employment. Never committed to a union of anything.

The world of employment and hiring is made to torture neuroatypical people and I am dreading so much this AI hiring hellscape.

Don’t want to say too much more because I’m still negotiating to potentially take a different position within the same company but it’s gonna be a major defeat either way and I still have kind of a bad feeling.

Sorry to Doom I’m just crushed. It was just my partner’s birthday too so it’s just the worst possible timing. Not that their is ever a good time for this.

It would mean a lot for anyone to check out the show I run with some friends. The money really just covers costs and we have a lot of great free eps too. We’re on apple and Spotify too and I’ll post the RSS later too

https://www.patreon.com/BrokenWind

Any tip/ideas for today’s hiring market are much appreciated too I’ve been in the job for a while now kinda.

Thanks for being such a wonderful little place on an increasingly awful internet. I can’t imagine how much worse I would feel if this place didn’t exist.

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