Shitty Food Porn

Before you get too far, here is the finished product.

I call it Creature of the Night.

I have a bunch of photos of it like a proud father.

No, I did not make this mess. Just thought it was funny a jar of sauce and box of spaghetti had both fallen.

I also burned my tongue trying to check if the potatoes are done

Got up at 3 this morning for Reasons and after taking care of some other chores I decided I wanted pancakes. Unfortunately I have no milk, no butter, no eggs, no maple syrup, and going to the store sounded like a herculean effort, so I made do with water, olive oil, a flax meal egg (~1 tbsp ground flax seeds, soaked in water for at least 5 mins) and an improvised strawberry jam thing.

Tried to do it from memory and eyeballed all the measurements. Dry ingredients are just flour, salt, baking soda, sugar, and since I used water instead of milk I covered it up by adding some other flavors with a couple drops of molasses and vanilla extract. Mix it all, slowly add water until the consistency is right, and voila! Also, fried the pancakes in olive oil just because I've got a lot of it. No ragrets. Truth is, you fry something in oil, it has a pretty good chance of coming out tasty.

Didn't remember I needed a topping until I was in the middle of doling out the first round of pancakes, so I threw some frozen strawberries into a tiny pan and let them simmer, mashing with a fork as they defrosted. Originally I was just gonna let that go until it thickened but the sugars started to caramelize and darken, so I panicked, killed the heat, added a couple teaspoons of arrowroot powder (basically corn starch) and stirred that thoroughly in between the last few sets of pancakes.

Despite all that, I'm still not 100% if this is the right sub for these; they came out super tasty. But between the gross brownish strawberry goop and my stove badly needing a cleaning... well. I do have eyes. Definitely doesn't belong in foodporn and I felt gross about putting it in a regular food sub.

Also, didn't properly preheat my cast iron, so the first set of pancakes came out looking kinda funky.

Swirling mtn dew Ah yes, an excellent vintage.

Garfield would be disappointed

3 eggs with veggie sausage, black beans, green onions, kale and fish sauce topped with salt & black pepper.

Absolutely delicious although the black bean juice seems to be giving my family psychic damage!

It looked and tasted like vomit though :/

It was supposed to be beef kafta but I think I screwed up the proportionals somewhere and I did not cook it properly :/

Recycled content, not OC

Raspberry noodles btw.

This is breakfast for a mentally ill person. They can have anything they want (more or less) but this is what they want. They'll add salt and pepper to the yogurt later 🤷

Here is their lunch