Criminally investigate the following "people" and "things"

Gym Jordan for his negligence/participation in the Ohio State sexual abuse case

Cuckhold Ted for that god-awful "beard" and receiving bribes through his podcast

All Republicans for the dark money they receive. We need to know where it comes from

Trump for soliciting bribes outside during his recent campaign

All those billion dollar donors for bribing the justices

Those are just the ones off the top of my head