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this post was submitted on 22 Jul 2023
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Asklemmy
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You're absolutely right. I've accomplished so much since my last - and abusive - relationship. For some reason I was able to recover from it very quickly, and I say this as someone who took 5 years to fully get over my first (also abusive) bf.
I was VERY codependent and the relationship traumatized me, but less than 2 months after the breakup, I entered an international comedy competition and won first place. Suddenly people who didn't give a shit about me before wanted me on their shows. I had all sorts of new opportunities thrown at me and now I have a huge list of things I can happily brag about.
I probably would never have taken that sort of plunge when I was with my ex. Maybe hitting rock bottom + the anger made me fearless, I don't know.
I still struggle a bit with self-image and social anxiety, but I can see how far I've come and I think overall, I'm a pretty cool person.
Thank you for reminding me that I don't have to settle for someone who doesn't see that. You're right, I shouldn't have to convince someone to be with me. I'll tell myself that next time I have a "everything reminds me of him :'(" moment (and I'm having a LOT of those, ughh)
Hell yeah! You rock and don’t you forget it.