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this post was submitted on 16 Aug 2024
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As far as I know, there is no way right now. There's some discussion of having a more agnostic identifier here, but seemingly no movement yet.
https://github.com/LemmyNet/lemmy/issues/2987
The best you can get right now is using an extension like Instance Assistant for Lemmy, but that only helps you, not the person you're responding to.
That said, if you use a mobile app (I use Thunder) it will usually handle post/comment links in-app, so it doesn't matter what instance they link to.
Thanks for confirming my suspicions! I had found that GitHub issue and actually tried the tilde link even though there’s no commits that mention it, just because the bang and at formatting work.
I do mainly use the Arctic app to interact with lemmy which also handles the url in app fine, but I like to do things the “right” way whenever possible.