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Internet forums are disappearing because now everything is Reddit and Discord. And that's worrying.
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There's a lot of nuance to be had here, but it's a conversation for another time.
You bring up something interesting though
I wonder if this is because people view these spaces as a home or a "third place". Like if someone did something offensive in your home, you would indeed ask (or force) them to leave.
People also find it insanely difficult to "leave" because all of their friends are on the platform. Since it's almost never open-protocol, that means being locked to said space - so you can only get people you don't like to leave.
We generally agree the moderation has become overbearing. I would argue most of it is straight up ineffective and performative. We need actual data and science backing moderation policies, not just "this feels good".