this post was submitted on 28 Jun 2025
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Do you feel one group is more emotional? And is the belief that women are more emotional spread by men?

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[–] merc@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 day ago

Women are allowed to express "weak" emotions: heartbroken, lonely, ashamed, anxious, panicked, etc. Women are also encouraged to work through their emotions and understand them. If women express emotions that can be associated with strength, they can be seen as not womanly enough: too much confidence is manly. Too brave is manly. Too proud is manly.

Men are allowed to express emotions of strength. Too much might be rude or classless, but there's no issue with it not being manly. OTOH, too much of the emotions of "weakness" and it's womanly.

I think men are seen as being less emotional because it's "manly" to suppress both "strong" and "weak" emotions. Athletes are given some of the most leeway in how they're allowed to act, but a male athlete who cries after losing is often seen as weak. One who celebrates a win too strongly is seen as a bad winner. Compare that to a lawyer who isn't really allowed to be sad after a loss or too proud of a win.

Women are expected to tone down certain "strong" emotions, but encouraged to display and talk about most other ones. Nobody would expect a women's team who lost the world cup final to be stoic. Crying is not only permitted, it's expected. But, if a female athlete goes too far in celebrating or taunting it's unusual at a minimum.

I suspect that men and women experience emotions similarly. But, I think male emotion is probably more destructive because men aren't encouraged to find healthy ways to express normal emotions.