You can’t run vmalert without flags

Running grep without parameters is also pretty fucking useless.

500 words in to the over 3,000 word dump, I gave up.

Claims to have a Unix background, doesn't RTFM.

Nobody really uses Kubernetes for day-to-day work, and it shows. Where UNIX concepts like files and pipes exist from OS internals up to interaction by actual people, cloud-native tooling feels like it’s meant for bureaucrats in well-paid jobs.

Translation: Author does not understand APIs.

Want an asynchronous, hierarchical, recursive, key-value database? With metadata like modified times and access control built-in? Sounds pretty fancy! Files and directories.

Ok. Now give me high availability, atomic writes to sets of keys, caching, access control...

I’m ashamed enough that I can’t really apply to these jobs

This reads as "I applied to the jobs and got rejected. There's nothing wrong with me, so the jobs must be broken".