Theres a video on youtube of romesh ranganathan, a successful Sri Lankan British comic who is fucking hilarious, successful and famous. Talented, clever, funny guy.

He says "I have an utter prick living inside my head and he talks to me a all the time.....hes a fucking asshole"

Same voice as op

Even when you're doing something of growth it finds a reason. Like op, training himself to be better in muay Thai and only comparing himself to those younger, faster and fitter than him. How could you possibly win that comparison.