What's wrong with me that I think some of these are really clever.

Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie this guy would be buried in the credits as something like “Second Tall Man.”

I mean, that's actually kind of brilliant.

My personal favorite being #8.

He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.

I love this list but I feel like I've been seeing it for 20+years sometimes