(TL;DR): I love being terrified, and this has led me to a fascination with imagining being a witness to / a victim of various tragedies. Is that weird?
The earliest example I can remember of wanting to know what it was like to be a victim of a tragedy was when I first learned what happened on 9/11. We were visiting my grandma, and she was watching a documentary about it. That's the first time I had seen the footage and heard an explanation of it all, and I was still a child (like way too young to be processing what I was seeing), but I was fascinated by it. Even after everyone had left the room to hang out on the porch, I stayed in the living room to watch more. I wanted to know everything, but most of all I wanted to know what it was like to be there. Both as a witness and a victim.
To this day, I would pay good money to get hooked up to something like Roy from Rick and Morty so I could safely experience it without knowing I was safe. And I'd like to choose as many perspectives as I want. From the hijackers, to the people on the directly impacted floors, the people on floors adjacent to the impact, the people who jumped, the people who were outside and witnessed the crashes and collapses, the people who were trapped on the upper floors and remained inside during the collapse...
Besides 9/11, others at the top of the list are things like mass shootings, earthquakes and other natural disasters, catastrophic workplace accidents (mostly explosions), the sinking of the Titanic, Hiroshima/nuclear testing sites, other war related events, various atrocities committed by/against mankind (like the torture committed by the CIA against people suspected of being involved in the 9/11 attacks), the Heaven's Gate mass suicide, a significant portion of Charles Manson's life... It's a mix of wanting the experience and curiosity about the stories/information that never made it into public knowledge.
I don't have a death wish or anything, it's just for some reason I have a fascination with terror. I love getting sleep paralysis and having nightmares, and I feel a weird sense of catharsis when I wake up and realize I'm safe. My favorite ones are when I'm utterly convinced I'm going to die. Even as a kid I loved terrifying shows (like Courage the Cowardly Dog and Mr.Meaty), and as a teenager it evolved into broader consumption of surrealist art, and then I started watching Live Leak videos where I got a more realistic sense of terror. I watched all of the Bjork stalker's tapes, which, if you aren't familiar, they end with him shooting himself after mailing a letter bomb to her. Knowing he filmed his suicide was what piqued my interest, but I also wanted to get into his head so I started from tape #1.
How weird is all of this? Any psychological explanations/speculations about why I'm like this? (And are there any other subs I should ask this in?)
As much as I hate to admit it, I used to be a transmedicalist. It came from a place of insecurity, fear, and ignorance.
I always thought "I wish I were trans" but I thought I couldn't be. I'm too masculine, my voice is too deep, I have too many traditionally masculine interests...all that BS. So when I saw trans people that didn't pass, I projected those insecurities onto them. (Thank GOD I was never vocal about it -_- it's hard to think about).
But the thing about that, and what it took me far too long to realize, is it truly doesn't matter if you pass. A gay person isn't any less gay if they haven't been in a homosexual relationship, so why would trans people be any less trans for not meeting some arbitrary qualifications that other people set for you? Just like being gay, what validates your "transness" is your feelings, not your actions.
Transitioning doesn't happen instantly, takes time and effort. So for someone to not take that into account when trying to understand trans people, whether they're cis or they're trans themselves, is just ignorant. (And there's plenty of reasons for trans people to not visibly/medically/otherwise noticably transition at all, especially in a society that is hostile towards LGBTQ people). It's not necessarily malicious, but it is ignorant, so you shouldn't let those people invalidate your identity and your feelings.
But to more directly answer the question: Transmedicalists (at least amongst allies) are rare, so I wouldn't worry too much about that kind of stuff when you're coming out to people. In my experience, it'll be obvious beforehand whether or not they'll accept you. And if someone doesn't accept you, I hope what I wrote above and what others have also mentioned here will help.