Triasha

joined 2 years ago
MODERATOR OF
[–] Triasha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 years ago

This is so hard.

First, it's OK to distance yourself from "I love you, but I can't support what you are doing."

My mother was devastated when I came out. But after seeing that I was serious about transition and she could either get on the boat or be left behind, she decided that she should offer some help with clothes and dressing nice. She introduced me as her daughter these days. She hasn't said anything shitty in over half a decade.

Second isolation is ok for safety, but not a long term strategy. Be nice to people, ask for help when you can, and you should meet women that will help you. Seek out queer spaces and navigate them as best you can. A trans woman taught me 95% of everything I know about makeup. My wife taught me nails when we started dating.

I'm sorry you are being hurt. It's not fair and you don't deserve it. Feel free to pm me if you ever want to chat, or vent, or share your stories. I love yo tell my own.

[–] Triasha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 years ago

I like the change. Both more inclusive and more exact.

[–] Triasha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 2 years ago

Damn I'm sorry. The only thing I can suggest is to give her space, as much as you can. You don't deserve this.

If you have any kind of support system outside of her, now is the time. I would stay off Facebook. Trying to do damage control there with a conservative family is probably going to do more harm than good.

It's going to hurt more before it gets better, but with time and some effort, it can get better. Care for the kids as best you can. Then care for yourself as best you can. Then care for your wife.

You have every chance of being a pretty woman. It make take hormones and time and hair removal, and maybe some makeup magic, but there will probably come a day when you can be proud of what you see in the mirror.

Regardless, who you see in the mirror is more important. Do your best, and the rest will fall as it may.

[–] Triasha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 2 years ago

I became more extroverted. More social, more outgoing. Being able to be myself is delightful, and my old quiet bookish persona doesn't fit me anymore.

I would expect significant change to be normal, mostly expressing ourselves in ways that didn't feel right before or ways werl didn't allow ourselves to in the past.

[–] Triasha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 14 points 2 years ago

“(your) right To swing your fist ends just where my nose begins”

Exactly, If you care so much transplant it into your uterus.

[–] Triasha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 11 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Hard dissagree. It's wrong in Nebraska, wrong in Germany, and wrong everywhere else where the standard is some date before birth.

[–] Triasha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 2 years ago

For the record, she was, probably, past that. My wife was born at 20 weeks, over three decades ago.

[–] Triasha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 2 years ago

What's the problem with 28 weeks?

Yes, it's clear that there must be a cutoff date. Personally, I like the biblical standard: baby's first breath.

[–] Triasha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 16 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I can't say this is something I have experienced. I got gender euphoria from the start right up to today.

But maybe you are gender fluid? If that fits then it fits. It's OK to be a man on Tues and a woman on Friday.

There is no wrong way to be you. There is only you. The words are only important if they are useful. When words fail, you are still here, and you are more important than the words will ever be.

It's OK to tell a story to simplify it down to strangers. (Like: I'm a trans woman) You don't need to have the whole experience of your transition down to an elevator speech.

I say this to give some guidance on how you could move through the world. Strangers get the simple lie. Friends and family get the more nuanced truth.

[–] Triasha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 years ago

Agree that rent control on it's own can be counter productive. Section 8 is good as a wealth transfer, and making it into an entitlement would be better still as a transition to housing as a human right. I think about housing much like I think about healthcare. The market can still exist and compete with the government provided option, they just have to compete with free.

 

For me, my mother told me she knew I was attracted to women since I was 3 or 4 years old because of the way I reacted to lady wrestlers on the television.

My orientation was never a mystery, but learning I was a lesbian was connected to understanding my gender. I did have a brief relationship involving a man after transition, but I broke it off after I realized that I did not like him, or men in general, the way I liked women.

Now I'm happily married.

What's your story?

[–] Triasha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 years ago

I hope to find many good memories here. Or at least a few snorts.

[–] Triasha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 2 years ago

Finally, some good, fucking, news.

 

I was thinking I would like to block the avalanche of low effort memes.

Is this possible? I'm super new, just made my account this week.

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