All I can say is, wut?
What bottlenecks are you experiencing on which services exactly?
Gmail, and add your domain as an alias?
I've looked at a couple of these type things (including Portainer and CosmosOS) and they just add another level of complexity. https://github.com/louislam/dockge looks to be a lot simpler and allows you to use commands that everyone is familiar with.
I use Seafile for this. Switched after getting fed up of fixing Nextcloud every time I updated it.
What are you expecting them to do with your IP?
Crikey.
DokuWiki. Quite a few natty plugins to go with it, light, simple, host anywhere.
Love seeing a rack mounted next to a sewage access plug!
Buy a cheap NVR. Much easier than pissing about with servers and Windows. Most will have a partner app and simple cloud connectivity. Much easier all round.
The correct answer has been given a few times here, split tunnelling.
But your idea is mental. If your IP changes and access is locked down by IP address how do you expect your phone to connect to your server to tell it about the new IP if it can;t access the server due to the fact it hasn't got the correct IP in the allow list?