Background: I've been in burnout at some level for 10 years. Chronic the whole time, sometimes also what I would describe as semi-acute to acute for many periods as well.

My current situation is that I won't have a place to live in about a month, and I need to raise my income, but I can't predict or guarantee that my brain will actually be functional enough to work. (I do tech stuff... right now I'm a web monkey but I'm trained as a software engineer, haven't written nontrivial code in several years tho)

In my case I'm worried that getting a job and then losing it because my brain went on strike for a few weeks/months could potentially kick off a blockbuster depressive episode. I get those lonnnnnnng slowwwwww deep shutdown, lose 50 IQ points as you stare into the deadlights depressions. One more of those could quite literally kill me. That said, my med stack works and my mood is controlled better now than at any point in my life, so, I need to worry about this less.

My current income is thru gig work and I want to increase that rather than get a "job," but here it's the same problem, if I land a client and my brain goes AWOL, it's going to be a problem. I have put a ton of work into my hardware+software stack though, and self-host nearly all my own shit, which is a big advantage when you're permanently overwhelmed, because you save big bucks on hosting bills, and the open source upgrade treadmill is a lot slower than with corporate software.

Anyway, enough about me. Anybody want to share stories or tips?

it’s very irritating — i even like closing the door for some reason to keep the cats out sometimes for complete privacy. I assume it’s something residual from childhood, but it’s very irritating. I’ve coalesced most of my main stuff that I use in the actual bedroom then the other rooms have more ‘display’ type stuff that I use less often

I can’t get myself to get up and be in my own damn living room. I don’t know why. It feels more empty, I suppose. It feels less….safe somehow. It’s very stupid and annoying that I am like this and I wish I wasn’t like this

and never mind the hell of knowing that some people actively hate being in their house, or preach that YOUr HomE iS JUsT A beD Get ouT THEre get OUt OF yoUr cOmFORT ZOnE. which is not the direction i want to go either, because that’s impossible for my brain and who i am at this point, and I’m fine with that. I like that about myself frankly.

But I want to watch a film on the big TV dammit.

I’m an Aspie, and I’m new to this community.

Maybe this information from TV Tropes will help?

i don't eat meat cause it's a thing i do since birth but it's also a thing i have to be kind of annoying about at restaurants etc to ensure that they hear me and interpret what i'm saying right (social anxiety is fun) cause then i'd have to eat the thing i don't want or have another more awkward interaction w the guy. and it's very bad in loud places cause it's even harder to make yourself understood (and i should i say i literally have a vocal condition where one of my vocal cords doesn't work so it's fun all around) and it just sucks.

so i tried to order this fucking impossible burger, but they don't like list separate burgers, they make you list out out loud every bit of what you want, and the fucking thing has a stupid fucking name so you sound like a dumbass saying the stupid fucking name so you're just blabbering at this poor guy who probably already wrote it down but it's loud and you're pissed off cause it's loud and you have to utter this stupid cutsey little brand name over and over instead of just beef mid-rare please like gordon ramsay. and they had it and it was fine but mid but like, i had to try to yell this out across a table of very cool people i'm trying to be normal and chill with. word has like 4 fucking syllables.

and this dude who's sitting at the end, very playful and cool and kind and everything, dave-grohl-esque, says jokingly to the guy at the end, in that sort of casual slightly sardonic jim halpert way, 'oh make sure about the impossible patty' which yes funny, i respect it is a good joke, i like the joke, but i hate being memed on when i'm put in a situation basically against my will that draws on years of trauma

recognized 95% of his examples.

cross-posted from: https://discuss.tchncs.de/post/6713283

This study is unique in considering difficulty initiating tasks of any type in real life settings, and by gathering qualitative data directly from autistic people. Four face-to-face and 2 online (text) focus groups were conducted with 32 autistic adults (19 female, 8 male, and 5 other), aged 23–64 who were able to express their internal experiences in words.

[...] Participants described difficulty starting, stopping and changing activities that was not within their conscious control. While difficulty with planning was common, a subset of participants described a profound impairment in initiating even simple actions more suggestive of a movement disorder. Prompting and compatible activity in the environment promoted action, while mental health difficulties and stress exacerbated difficulties. Inertia had pervasive effects on participants’ day-to-day activities and wellbeing.

cross-posted from: https://discuss.tchncs.de/post/4450613

I encourage anyone who wants to see more traffic, and has the resources to do so, to create a throwaway account and confess some personal shit on here!! chances are if you do, somebody else out there will end up feeling less alone. that's exactly what I'm doing 😃

before realizing I'm on the spectrum I've been to some support groups for other conditions as well as going thru DBT, and one thing I realized is that sometimes it's cool to have a space to just put your stuff on the table, and everybody else has done so to some extent as well, and you can approach each other as human beings with less pretense because they already know your stuff unlike everyone in "real life" who you're trying to impress.

anyway. try it out! and then ghost the account in a few days/weeks/months, or don't.

but we all know adults on the spectrum have basically no resources. getting some traffic going here could turn this into one.

This is a Lemmy alternative to /r/aspergers. The idea is to follow the same rules and make this a place where we can support eachother.