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this post was submitted on 03 Apr 2024
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Y'know what? I hope they get Keanu.
I hope every actor returns, and they all half-ass it as hard as they can. I hope the whole cast does the movie sarcastically.
I hope every subsequent film from this idiot robot studio in this zombie franchise is sillier and more self-sabotaging than the last, and they keep cranking them out anyway. Let the whole thing descend into SCP cursed-VHS-tape levels of self-aware vicious condemnation. The Matrix 6 has Slavoj Zizek, as himself, explain to Agent Smith's ghost why he's an asshole, and Hugo Weaving just sits there, stone-faced, in a silly hat. The Matrix 7 is mostly Lana and whatsherface dunking on conservative bigots with an in-character Greek chorus. The Matrix 8 has Will Smith as Neo opposite Laurence Fishburne doing a Sean Connery impression, but it's all a joke at Will Smith's expense, and apparently he's into that. The Matrix 9 brings back Joey Pants for a stealth remake of Memento that's mostly satirizing later Christopher Nolan. The Matrix 10 is a stoner comedy. The Matrix 11 is animated, so that David Zaslov will erase it from existence, and the series can finally die.
Matrix 10 about to be good tho, Keanu can bring the Ted energy
Letting Alex Winters do set design or cinematography for any of these would be genuinely fantastic. Some upgraded Agent interrupts a conversation and Neo slaps him in clean in half lengthwise. Pan left, smack, schlorp, pan right. Barely an inconvenience. 30 frames. The machines can't be bothered forming a big floating head, so Keanu has a pivotal debate with three flathead screws forming a minimalist face on a square inch of floor. The Oracle is now a life-size claymation figure and absolutely nobody mentions it.
Wow I have to admit I came into this post with a negative perspective. But y'all have sold me on the upcoming sequels