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I've never liked this female anime character trope
(hexbear.net)
The "angsty badass female warrior who's also a tragic broken flower who feels her entire existence as a warrior is a horrible violation of her femininity"
I think it's fine to have characters who don't like or despise fighting despite being good at it, but I've never liked this specific variation, especially when their arcs always seem to conclude with them being "saved" (or killed) after being humbled by a dude
Ma'am, this is a Wendy's
I can't think of any specific example off the top of my head, but I imagine that exists somewhere...
(Edit: Actually if I remember correctly that's basically the premise of the book "The Sun Also Rises", because it's about a guy who got his dick shot off in WW1.)
On the other hand if you have a "grown child soldier man", I imagine that the assumption is that he's got it in at least one point in his life.
It's like the "Solid Snake / Otacon" dichotomy.