I made this as a jokey comment but I have actually been reflecting since then about how having longstanding neuro symptoms / chronic illness / long covid affects my self-image of my masculinity. I've never been a macho man but it is part of my identity which looks and feels different now that I'm moving slower and need a lot more rest and downtime.

I don't feel like "less of a man" but I do feel less capable than I used to of the kind of stoic provider role with the people close to me, which suddenly makes me realize that I was doing that at all.

And I actually haven't read and bell hooks yet, I really need to get on it.