this post was submitted on 23 Apr 2025
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There is a local restaurant whose online menu only works in Chrome. It's like, this is takeout, what fucking computation is happening here that requires a specific web package? This should be a PDF with a phone number on it and it should load instantaneously
I remember visiting Italy just as things were opening after Covid and one very small restaurant had a QR code on the table which took you to a website where you had the choice of downloading the android or iOS app for the menu. My friends did it and it crashed immediately.
"hello restaurant I would like to pay you money for your food"
restaurant:
"Noooo my restaurant's website needs to be made of 200 MB of Javascript that you need 10 trillion CPU cycles to decode and turn back into its natural form: like 30 lines of text that go like "Sugar slop - $23.99" but it's made of like 729 DOM elements that causes screen readers to crash and delete themselves from your hard drive and also reformat your C drive. Clearly you didn't invest in ChatGPT Pro's OCR capabilities"
Return to menu.txt
Fuck it, if you rly want some structure do Sugar slop$23.99. Some Californian IETF guy driven insane by object oriented metaphysics and macrodoses of substances at Burning Man 1998 worked hard on that schema!!!!
The bourgeois fear actual labor so much they have managed to abstract away so much from..... simple machine-parsable languages that some guy can just write once and be done with it's like we're back in 1996 with hacking but so much worse performance
Half the sites I visit now make me crack hashes to get their web proxy to even let me in cuz the bourgeois were not even satisfied with incomprehensible Javascript framework async await (we have forsaken SMP in an era where the CPUs are not getting that much faster despite the best efforts of the Israeli and American MIC drone controller computer engineers to make them even more unreliable and nondeterministic) webscale sludge code, now we have to do vibe coding statistics garbage-in-garbage-out magic (wowww, the products just make themselves, no labor in sight!!!!)
When I go on the internet I want to read the information on the screen and then sometimes take real-life actions off the internet based on that information. And the modern web often feels totally hostile to that usage