this post was submitted on 17 Jul 2025
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Not the PLA either... amerikkka

Made a new account to hopefully minimize self-doxing, but here's some background. I haven't lived with him in 10 years and I left the country 4 years ago. We don't really talk all that often, but he had messaged me with some questions about photography and then brought it up.

I said something like "I'm sure you're aware I don't have a very fond opinion of the military". He said "I'm not too enthused with the idea either, but I need the security and discipline that it will provide while I try to find something to dedicate myself to and I've been in this dead end job for about 2 years and my soul is decaying".

I told him he can come live with me, that it's easy to get a 1 year visa and I'd happily pay for flights and I have a spare room. He said he'd think about it but "needs physical activity and more friends and connection in general". I tried to explain that I go climbing multiple days a week, volunteer for search and rescue, and play board games with friends every week that he'd be able to hang out with.

I get the impression though that he thinks visiting would just be putting his problems on hold for a year; maybe he's right about that, but I think living somewhere other than our shit hometown would give him a lot of perspective on the world and help him maybe realize that what he actually needs is a community of some kind. I don't want him to make a huge fucking mistake because he feels hopeless and gets pressured into it by our conservative step dad or some recruiter or whatever.

I also briefly tried explaining some issues with the US military, but it's a bit hard to undo decades of american "education" in one conversation. He said "my moral code is also not nearly as strong as yours, and I have very little strong feelings toward very much at all outside of just trying to be a good person". I assume he reached out to me because he's having some doubts.

Anyway I tried to make it super clear that if he wanted to come live with me or if he wanted to do a work visa somewhere else I'd pay flights and anything else and help in any way I can; I'm not rich, but I have a small emergency savings.

I think I've heard there are organizations of leftist / anti-imperialist veterans? Maybe one of them has information I could send him. Any advice or ideas would be appreciated.

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[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 10 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (3 children)

I need the security and discipline that it will provide

That is not a reason someone comes to on their own.

I've been in this dead end job for about 2 years and my soul is decaying

That is worker alienation

I would consider attacking the source of these ideas. Who or what put that choice of words in his head "I need security and discipline". It sounds like exactly what a recruiter would say.

They're unhappy and alienated, a recruiter has recognised this and told him that the answer to his alienation is finding purpose, then told him that the military is the place to find your purpose in life, your true calling, a cause that matters, yadayadayada. It's strong stuff and it manipulates the minds of the depressed and alienated quite effectively.

EDIT: Interestingly if you plug this question into google you get a 7 year old /r/communism thread

[–] helpwithbrother@hexbear.net 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

That is not a reason someone comes to on their own.

Yea it honestly didn't even sound like him. I'll have a read through that thread, thanks a bunch!

[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 6 points 1 week ago

I don't know if the thread is any good to be honest it just surprised me to see it as the first google result for a question that a considerable number of parents and family members must search, it even autofilled my question from "talk someone out of" so it's definitely a common question.

Edit: Looked it up, this exact phrase gets searched 20 times per day.

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