this post was submitted on 24 May 2026
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The first half is true. The conclusion is wrong.
No one ever thinks they're in the wrong while they're doing something. No one. The fact that they are doing it is evidence that they have a justification for it. People only realize they're the problem after they do a thing. That's not just men. That's how we all work. Men change when they can be convinced that their past behavior was wrong.
Thank you! I can't stand the sentiment that people can't change. It's so harmful.
I agree. I think the reason that this kind of behavior is so prominent in men is that the world around them tends to be more approving of men in general. A patriarchal society will be more forgiving and allow worse behavior to fester in men while being more scrutinizing and judgemental of "others".
Himpathy. It's a real thing.
This is so well said and such a demonstration of why this problem will take a fundamental cultural shift to solve. The irony is that the op (and everyone else don't get me wrong) can't see this exact problem in their post for the reason you said.
Change is gradual and always a result of a person believing they are the ones who chose to change, sometimes change comes along and the person thinks they've stayed the same.
And, not to downplay the OP, but men have changed for the better. It sounds ridiculous, but compared to the 1900s? Holy shit have things gotten better. The issue is that there's so much more societal consciousness about it and it's still agonizingly slow.
It's changed for the better since the '70s/'80s even. It's also backslid a couple of times since then (and we're in the middle of a massive backslide right now in much of the world).