Asklemmy

Ethan Cohen's poem "The Drunken Driver Has The Right Of Way":

"The loudest have the final say, The wanton win, the rash hold sway, The realist’s rules of order say The drunken driver has the right of way.

"The Kubla Khan can butt in line; The biggest brute can take what’s mine; When heavyweights break wind, that’s fine; No matter what a judge might say, The drunken driver has the right of way.

"The guiltiest feel free of guilt; Who care not, bloom; who worry, wilt; Plans better laid are rarely built For forethought seldom wins the day; The drunken driver has the right of way.

"The most attentive and unfailing Carefulness is unavailing Wheresoever fools are flailing; Wisdom there is held at bay; The drunken driver has the right of way.

"De jure is de facto’s slave; The most foolhardy beat the brave; Brass routs restraint; low lies high’s grave; When conscience leads you, it’s astray; The drunken driver has the right of way.

"It’s only the naivest who’ll Deny this, that the reckless rule; When facing an oncoming fool The practiced and sagacious say Watch out — one side — look sharp — gang way.

"However much you plan and pray, Alas, alack, tant pis, oy vey, Now — heretofore — til Judgment Day, The drunken driver has the right of way."