this post was submitted on 31 Dec 2025
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So then he is misinformed, which many people are. I don't put someone into the "enemy" box for being misinformed or stubborn, that's pretty much the default state of most humans.
When you combine ignorance with combativeness you are a roadblock that needs to go.
If he was simply uninformed and sough to learn, he wouldn't trying to make himself to be a victim to 'win' an argument in his head. This is reactionary behaviour, and reactionaries are the enemy.
I just don't know what to say because I was that person before. A lot of people men especially are extremely pigheaded and argumentative, and you can be justifiably upset at them. If your goal is to help women and further feminism though, even a "correct" gotcha like this makes people less receptive to feminism. It's just making enemies out of people who might be wrong, stubborn, and combative, which unfortunately is basically everyone at some point in their life.
Being confronted and having to think about or explain your bigotry is the only way they can learn.
In my opinion, shaming people for bigoted opinions can be effective and even necessary at times, but only serves to change people’s behavior.
I’ve found that the main thing that changes people’s thoughts or values are measured explanations or evidence to the contrary.
I wish more people understood this