this post was submitted on 25 Jan 2026
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Branding and beans for breakfast. That's why the English get the win here, which is also occasionally called a full Irish breakfast if there's no Brits looking. Plus, the English hardly have any indigenous culinary variety or spices. Why else colonize with such a passion?
And I'm actually very much ok with black pudding, that's not the issue. I don't like northern French cuisine because it's just "how much butter and cream can we pump into this snail or these poor mushrooms or a potato that was fine all on its own? Can we drown this perfectly mediocre cut of beef in cream and butter to make it seem fancy?" I'm far more partial to living below the butter/olive oil border. Southern France on the sea is tolerable, they're also below the border.
Snails are not a northern France thing though (unless you have a loose definition of north). It's mostly central, with a huge correlation with tourist hotspots
They confused Central French with Northern French, but it's true that classic French cuisine, both northern and central, use too much dairy.
I mean I love France with all my being, but there's no denying the use of cream and butter (or cheese in Northern French cuisine.
Well, my objection is to the way they're prepared in France, not the snails.
I've had snails in Morocco and giant forest snails in Ghana. The big ones are delicious if they're wild caught. If they're farmed, they taste like the rotten lettuce they get fed.
French cooking is cheap peasant foods with lipstick applied and loads of makeup to try and cover up that fact.
Butter is the caked on foundation. Cream the 12 coats of eyeliner. This is the perfect simile.