transcription: "your a lesbian you cant like cock" are girls allowed to do anything?
this post was submitted on 07 Feb 2026
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You know I never considered that my difficulties with sex where related to dysphoria. I'll sometimes feel myself like withdraw and close off emotionally during sex, and I lose most of the sensation in/around my penis. I barely feel any pleasure when this happens and it makes it pretty much impossible to orgasm, let alone maintain an erection. Is that dissociating during sex?
Looking back I think I was definitely feeling like I wasn't having sex the way I wanted to somehow, but I could never figure out what to do to make it feel right. Like it was good sex, my partners were happy, I felt close to them, I would be really into it, but more often than not I would end up like that and would just have to give up. It caused some serious strain in past relationships and I always felt terrible about it, but nothing I ever did seemed to help. I'm hoping transitioning will help, but I haven't had the chance to test it since I started hormones. I really hope I can start enjoying this thing with partners because it's just so fun to make them cum with it...
yes, that does sound a lot like my experiences and does sound like dissociation.
I usually could still feel sensation, but I often felt disembodied and like my body became an object. That actually really helped me cope with sex - feeling like I was watching my body as someone else's could actually make it sexy and helped me with arousal and playing the role I needed to play in sex (even if it was also like I wasn't there and it made sex sort of impersonal and weird).
I actually think my dissociation helped me be a really good lover - I felt the most pleasure through my partner's body, and I was very attentive and giving because I couldn't really be the focus. But my partner is more of a top and I strongly prefer to bottom, and she really wants me to be able to receive pleasure, so it was a problem in those ways.
once I stopped repressing and started HRT and socially transitioned, my dysphoria got worse and worse - all my coping strategies were falling away, and while I was more present I was also more acutely distressed by my genital situation, particularly during sex. Sometimes I would think I was fine but I would end up very suddenly shutting down and then I would feel so defective I would spiral about how broken I was and that could lead to sobbing and further distress (even not wanting to be alive, etc.).
What really helped me was bottom surgery. Orchi really helped because I was most dysphoric about that part of my genitals (my penis was small and cute to begin with, and it was often tucked somewhat inside me - so it was not too bad; but when it was erect it felt silly and weird - but it didn't usually make me feel nauseous and horrible the way my scrotum and testes did).
The vaginoplasty was what made me feel like I finally had a female body, and while I still have bottom dysphoria post-op (still hasn't even been a year), it has gone away over time and sex has become much better. I still dissociate during sex, but I have also been able to be the center of attention and receive pleasure in ways I struggled to before, and I have been able to feel sexy in my body for maybe the first time in my life. It's getting much better, and I am not sure I would have been able to have these experiences without surgery. (I did cope in various ways pre-op, though - like wearing underwear to hide my genitals, and giving up on penetrative sex and only using my phallus like a clit - particularly using a magic wand on it was nice).
I hope your experiences with HRT are as wonderful for you as they were for me, and I wish you luck navigating all of this. 💜