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How do I tame my frustration toward my aging parents?
(lemmy.world)
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this post was submitted on 07 Sep 2023
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Not to get extreme, but my Dad died at the age of 63 after having a series of strokes that really caused a huge decline in his ability to function. Forgetfulness, loss of mobility, just an all-around descent into almost like a second toddler age. I was helping to take care of him during his last few years and in the run-up to his ultimately dying from a stroke, it felt like everytime I turned around he lost some basic functionality that you just sort of assume everyone who isn't a toddler still has. At some point, without any of us knowing, the Dad I knew growing up was gone, and left in his place was this weak-willed person who craved only soda and cigarettes, that's all he'd ever ask about. He watched The Irishman on repeat for days or weeks on end, because he'd forget what he had already watched just minutes prior. It was frustrating as all hell, but I would give anything in the world just to have that version of my Dad back for even just a few minutes. There was a few times I lost my patience with him and I still regret it. He died two years ago and I still think about him almost daily.
Not to get melodramatic or macabre, but you don't want these memories of your parents to be haunted with remembrances of you losing your temper with them.