The wise way is to tell your partner Grandma says it's important to have separate bank accounts, as my MIL said to me, and my husband agreed. We have had them for 30 years together. Sometimes it's been handy that one side has a better credit rating at that moment.

But if your partner objects, or tries to sabotage it in any way, that's a huge red flag for gaslighting and abuse. So it's time to make that secret account and start taking steps to escape safely. Granny may well have already seen the signs you're too in love to see.