L

Sometimes I hate being on the autistic spectrum, because I KNOW I'd end up making the same scene that this guy did and launch into the exact same petty argument. Well. . .probably. I'm a woman in my case, so I might just be stuck baking the cake myself and never have it come up. It's not that, to use this guy's situation as an example, vanilla is bad, it's that once something is decided, it gets baked (heh) into my head, so any deviation from what was explicitly established throws me off hard enough that I start feeling way less logical and appreciative than I would otherwise and acting like a child.

Granted, the response from the woman (and the response neurotypicals tend to give to pushback over minor situations in general) confuses me anyway. It's. . .cake? It's not that serious? Since I'm also PICKY, I also very much get having to quickly cover my blunt comments with "I'm not saying this because of anything wrong with your cooking, I swear, the dish was cooked well and looked great, I'm just super finicky and dislike (insert ingredient here)." Which. . .apparently wasn't enough in this case? Like, it's not personal. It's REALLY not personal. If I say I'm not in the mood for vanilla today, it means I'm just not in the mood for vanilla today. I assume it's the same for this guy. No one is trying to "embarrass you in front of your kids." How does that reflect on you? You're not the one eating around a line of vanilla and complaining about home cooking made with love. THAT'S embarrassing. When I eat around stuff, I KNOW I look like a clown and just hope no one cares. Then she tried to intimidate him by threatening to stop doing something nice for him and he. . .gave an admittedly pretty rude but also perfectly fair response in the heat of the moment? Like, he DID overreact, and it's weird he didn't notice in retrospect, but HUMANS overreact just by nature, and the response to this both privately and publicly is enough to make me live in existential terror because holy crap, THIS is all it takes to be a pariah?

Is all this drawing battle lines in the sand between neurotypical and neurodivergent people? Finicky people and people who just scoop up anything on their plate? Both? Considering all the women responding to the question, is it partially because he's a guy and there's some kind of subtext of assumed misogyny, so to a degree I DON'T have to worry about this? Or is there something else here I'm missing?

EDIT All of which is to say, his behavior was still BAD, and frankly I think he lacks a shocking amount of self awareness, I just GET it. Frankly, I SUPER agree with some of the other comments here that say the core issue here is a communication issue. Neither of these people know how to explain their side, so it's just. . .two people getting progressively angrier at each other and it turning into a mess.

I'm in camp "Midwestern American who says tuna fish". . .but I'm also right there with the person that said they don't order them and tuna fish sandwiches are something made at home.

For the record, I don't know why the fish part is specified. It just always was. It's not like my family called it a "can of tuna fish" growing up or anything. It's just the sandwiches. Put that tuna between two slices of bread and suddenly the word "fish" gets thrown in there. Maybe it just sounds more fun if you add more syllables? Either that or somebody in the region had to explain that tuna was a kind of fish years and years ago and it just stuck.

Well, Jabba is wide, wrinkly, and tapers off at the end, so,

Croissant

"But that's not a bagel-"

Jabba is also a crime lord, and thus does not care about your laws.

Croissant

I can relate HARD.

I've been working on mine since I upgraded to playing Skyrim on PC a YEAR ago. I had a laptop break on me and switched to a desktop in that time span. Sometimes I make it long enough to even try a quest mod. Forgotten City. Clockwork. Initially I had no clue how to run Dyndolod. Gave up on it. Then I found a tutorial video that explained it and tried again, and it worked. In this time frame SKSE and especially animation mods have worked on the latest version of Skyrim, been broken, and worked again.

At one point I decided to switch to a joke playthrough. I shuffled through a lot of stuff, but when I settled on my humor mods, that was the furthest I made it. Did a couple LotD quests and went through like half of The Wheels of Lull. I really liked the writing on that one, although I cheesed some frustrating layouts and bosses in the last part I did with a grappling hook mod and a mod that let me summon a non-offensive swarm of chickens. Keeping those. But before the next stage could trigger, I petered out. I. . .I think I might have gotten fed up with Nazeemic, a mod that spawned Nazeems in the leveled lists, which only got really out of hand at the level I was at? And then I wanted to try The Great City of Winterhold, but OH, NO! A couple of my joke mods were incompatible, and no one made patches! So I went back to planning for serious roleplay. Partially. And since I felt all of the LotD and Lull quests started too early, I downloaded a patch for LotD and kicked Lull's quest start levels up massively in xEdit. Did the same thing for The Forgotten City and Clockwork, too. Hopefully that doesn't break anything!

And of course the graphics and overhaul mods. Initially resisted on most of them. But the switch from laptop to desktop made me curious just how much of a power upgrade it was. I installed one or two at first. Happy Little Trees was one I really wanted. Dyndolod for it wasn't working for me for months and I gave up on that too, but I very recently discovered it was some really stupid user error. Fixed it. I also installed a couple of The Great Towns because they expanded content. Shor's Stone. Karthwasten. But after seeing The Great City of Winterhold, it became an addiction. Endless mesh, texture, and town replacers ensued, and are ensuing. My PC storage is starting to creak.

Enhanced Solitude in particular was a real head-scratcher. When I tried it on my laptop, it was broken in all sorts of ways. It added a replacement torch mesh without a texture. Entering the bathhouse crashed my game. And of course, the reported lag was true for me as well. But after seeing The Great City of Winterhold, I cautiously decided to try again resolving to investigate further since I'd learned to better read crash logs, and despite it being the exact same file. . .none of these things happened? My laptop was just weak enough that it somehow caused all kinds of chaos. I still made a personal patch deleting some of the extra NPCs, though, just in case. And a couple decor items I subjectively didn't find aesthetically pleasing. And I'm thinking of making another at some point to add Sweets and Such items to the bakers, or at least the baker on the street since his inventory is sad. Considering the perms, maybe I could even upload them if I feel satisfied enough.

I remember drawing on top of a meme in anticipation of Xelzaz 1.7. I'm now planning to tell myself "OK, NOW I'm done for sure" when Xelzaz 1.10 comes out.

It's always something.

. . .

Haven't seen a yak shaving mod, but there is a cow tipping one, BTW.

Yes I have it installed.

He doxxed himself. Honestly, not the brightest move. Somehow it took until everyone on the internet turned on him for him to realize that wasn't a good idea. Wasn't just his real name, either, I just realized that his mod also made a point of sharing another piece of information that would allow people to find him exactly. And to a dangerous degree, too, considering he was using the mod to memorialize a trans woman who passed away.

Honestly I just kind of ignore the part where he's arguing that, he's trying to clean up his online footprint that he objectively screwed up because he already had his open personal info used against him and now he's freaked out. Which I don't hold against him really, mistakes are mistakes and being in this kind of situation would cloud anyone's head from stress. It was just. . .also another mistake to assume malice when a lot of people were unaware. Even considering the, uh. Tension involved.

. . .TBH, the word "doxx" has been tossed around like a ragdoll this whole time and I don't think anyone's used it accurately once.

Hopefully some lessons are at least learned from all this.

Apparently there was even more to it than that. The audio files that were provided in that thread appear to have been maliciously edited. Since you were the one who shared the initial Reddit post with everyone and your post here has received the most engagement on the matter, I figure that posting the update that has been posted to provide a fuller picture once again would be a reasonable idea.

https://www.reddit.com/r/skyrimmods/comments/14qwcap/regarding_recent_allegations_about_me_and_my_mod/

Admittedly my posting the link three different times is a bit heavy handed, but this thread is starting to get old and I figured that the people who were involved in discussing the Reddit side of the drama initially might appreciate being given an update on the situation.

Seems like there was actually an update to this situation. Since you personally seem to have been the most incensed at the mod author, I figured sharing the update directly to your post here would be important as well. If nothing else for clarity. https://www.reddit.com/r/skyrimmods/comments/14qwcap/regarding_recent_allegations_about_me_and_my_mod/

Seems like we were all taken for a ride??

Now that new information is out, I have an additional post I'd like to make about something odd that I saw in the initial Reddit thread, that I feel now has new context with what was revealed in the new Reddit thread.

So, in the new Reddit thread, THIS was the middle paragraph of what Gore's mod author posted and part of the video, which, uh

At the tail end of this video, alarycia claimed that Thallassa, and the other Skyrim mods subreddit admins and discord mods, bought her [NSFW] to blackmail her about her [NSFW], and that they were behind all of this. If you’ve seen any of what happened on the subreddit, you would know thallassa was the mod she and mooky went to publicly denounce us on the subreddit and have in her corner. It is our belief she made these allegations up about them, just like she did the ones about us, so our two modmin teams would not have any communication. So that she could get away with cutting and cropping DM’s and tell Thallassa that she was doing so because she was [smack] taking other women in our server that she tried to involve in this. The reality is she was [smack] talking thal and making horrific allegations about her, and the other women on their modmin team.

Even in this crazy situation, this is absolutely insane. But I'd been thinking about something odd that mookymilk posted in the initial Reddit thread for a while that I think this might just put into additional context.

All things considered, [Gore developer's name] could've just taken the L on the mod, rather than have his actions exposed publicly. You would have rathered no one know and just kept developing your mod. It was the merciful option so as not to cause an uproar.

This

is weird.

The more I stared at it, the more it didn't make sense. Wouldn't taking down the mod draw attention publicly to Hayden's actions? Wouldn't ceasing development draw more attention? How would this situation involve Gore's mod author "taking the L" on the mod, when Gore actually had nothing to do with the accusations posted outside of being how everyone met? How would taking it down be "the merciful option so as to not cause an uproar?"

And the more I stared at it, the more I was like. . .wait, doesn't that sound like blackmail?

Like none of the allegations were ever the point, and for whatever twisted reason this was all one huge ruse to get Hayden to take Gore down?

And I was like, no, no, if I say that I'll look insane. Even I felt a little crazy for thinking it.

But in light of the information exonerating Gore's developer, it's been put into a bit of a different perspective for me. If Alarycia and mookymilk claimed that everything they did to Gore's developer was stuff he actually did to them. . .and now with the new information presented, they've been caught claiming that the Reddit mod that stood up for them blackmailed them, it puts it in a different light. What if all this was blackmail in some bizarre fashion? And this statement in the initial Reddit thread just. . .slipped out, because mooky was so excited to carry on the ruse that she accidentally hinted at the truth.

. . .I don't know, this has been a wild situation, and it has me thinking some wild things.

. . .ehh?? Well that explains why the comments section for it unlocked and then locked again.

Looking at RabbittWinri's Discord, he seems to have decided to. . .go back to working on it like nothing happened???

Which is frickin' weird, but the messed up thing is that it only really tells us more about our own biases than what's actually going on. If he's guilty, then of course he wants to evade consequences for the whole thing. And if he's innocent, the allegations he made were serious enough that he probably just wants everyone targeting him to buzz off. Because, you know, the reason he initially decided to stop was because he was being targeted, and now he intends to take other routes to deal with the situation.

. . .Looking at back at mooky's post, the image where she says she has doxxing receipts has screenshots of him actually attesting to the fact that he was going to do exactly the above, so I guess we could have technically found out sooner. . .but it's the exact same post where she kept lying about other topics for no fathomable reason, so I've started placing under deeper scrutiny what the context could be and why she would say that. Frankly I think there's a theme of Gore's dev doing things that look incredibly suspicious, but far more so if you already presume guilt out of him. The litigation threats towards the women are real as per what RabbittWinri told me, but if his friends and family were actually targeted he actually has grounds. . .plus can't Alarycia countersue if he's serious? If he's lying, good luck in court I guess.

I'm going to guess the threat to contact (presumably mooky's) college is also real (and worded in an entirely childish manner that doesn't help his case), but that's. . .not actually doxxing unless he says what college it is publicly, which the screenshot conspicuously doesn't show. Doxxing is posting someone's private contact information online, not alluding to the fact that you might have some of it. Which tracks, because in some comments that I think the mods deleted but are still visible on mooky's page, she also accuses RabbittWinri of doxxing the Kaidan 2 Extended server, which is. . .also not what happened. She links the exact same thread I did in another post at one point, which very clearly just posts people's Discord names. There was no personal information presented at any point. That is, at most, exactly as much doxxing as mooky is doing herself constantly bringing up RabbittWinri's friend. I mean, as far as the Imgur link goes, Hayd contacting their college is unsettling, yes, but doxxing is still different than what's being shown, and if they contacted his IRL friends and family. . .well, it's not a good look, but I can see where the motive would come from. And the kicker with that particular screenshot is that it's cut off at the top in a way that makes Gore's dev look like a cartoon supervillain, but with a comment that could very easily be referring to mooky and Alarycia. Which wouldn't prove innocence, either, but is definitely some very deceptive editing if I'm picking up on it correctly.

For my part, I'm still going to watch the situation cautiously. I'm not going to fully presume innocence of him yet, perhaps it'll still turn out that he harassed Alarycia and I'm going to look very silly for playing devil's advocate, but at the absolute minimum I no longer unquestioningly believe anything mooky said. Even the Reddit mod doesn't know where the heck she came from, the response was basically just "Well, Alarycia has a very good track record on our server, so I have no reason to disbelieve any of this. . .oh, and mooky corroborated it, I guess. No clue who this woman is, but she's a second witness, so she must be in the clear."

Yeah? And I was in Carthage that time when it stopped being Carthage.

Even if Alarycia is telling the truth, I'm fairly certain at this point that mookymilk at best was contacted by Alarycia the same way RabbittWinri's friend was, took one look at the accusations made, and decided to take what she thought was a good opportunity for 15 minutes of fame and run with it. And her testimony being bunk raises questions about the whole thing. Does she seem normal outside of this incident? Yeah, but like. I've unknowingly hung out with not one, but two different guys that pretended to be their own girlfriends online for attention and was clueless for years, along with an entire community of other people. Both of them faked all kinds of other bizarre drama as well and people didn't realize until things eventually came to a head. It wasn't a focus for people because, 99% of the time, they just posted normal content about their hobbies. People are weird. She wants approval from Alarycia, she wants approval from the Kaidan 2 Extended team, and she wants approval from Reddit. And she's pleased as punch that she's getting it.

Admittedly this post got kind of long and off the original topic, but I wanted to make a point about how perspective plays a big part in how everything comes off. The Reddit mod being exasperated that several people showed them "evidence" of the accusations being fake but it all just being what she saw is probably because all of the information is incredibly ambiguous to the point that people can make contradictory assumptions. I don't think anyone can claim that HaydenDaws is a man possessed of the fine art of, ahem, social skills. On the other hand, a massive chunk of the narrative against him is someone who's clearly just in this whole thing for attention regardless of what literally anyone else's motives are, so I'm going to just watch the whole thing with narrowed eyes and see what comes of it. While continuing to make note of any developments I can find to see which way the evidence falls.

WELL

Personally I felt the exact same way and was on quite a kick a few months ago. I think I might have a few options here!

To start with, hrodeberht1's various food vendor mods:

Necro Pizza

Necro Pizzeria

Burger Jarl

Tacocat

Sausages of Solitude

Sweet Roll Mods:

Sweet Roll Hut SE

Sugar Atronach

Sweetrollin'

Sweetroll Randomization Act SE

Daedric Punishment for Insults Related to Sweetrolls

CHEESE! FOR EVERYONE!

CHEESE HOUSE

Cheese Weapon

Cheese Magic

CHEESE

Cheesemod for EVERYONE (Serious mod, but still funny and fits well here)

Guest Starring: Chickens

Chicken SSE

Chickens

The Riverwood Chicken - Spooky Poultrygeist.

Conjure the Vengeful Spirit of the Riverwood Chicken

Golden Chicken

A couple of additional great spell mods:

Plunket's Miscellany SE

Ion Cannon

Summon Something

Then for mobs, you can add these:

Mammoth Cheese

Tyrannosaurids - (Prehistoric Content Series) SE

Scaly Tyrannosaurids (Prehistoric Content Series Rexes Without Feathers)

Marsh Leviathans (Prehistoric Content Series) SE

Scaly Marsh Leviathans (Prehistoric Content Series)

Hadrosaurs of Skyrim - (Prehistoric Content Series Pt. 5) SE

Hadrosaurs of Skyrim - Retexture

Oviraptors of Skyrim - (Prehistoric Content Series Pt. 6) SE

Behemoths - (Prehistoric Content Series Pt. 7) SE

Ankylosaurids - (Prehistoric Content Series Pt. 8) SE

Ceratopsids - (Prehistoric Content Series Pt. 11) SE

Dimorphodon - (Prehistoric Content Series Pt. 12) SE

Sentient Chairs of Skyrim (SCOS)

Nazeemic (Warning: Nazeems hit hard and will steadily take over the leveled lists as you level up. Save for a masochist's playthrough)

Crossover Content?

Periyitoon

Final Fantasy VII Remake Buster Sword SE

Minepals

Relics of Hyrule - A DLC Scale Zelda Mod (Serious mod, but adds to the vibe)

Skyrim's Paraglider (Serious mod, but adds to the vibe)

And if you want something to use all those new mobs with, Vicn (Yes, that Vicn) has you covered:

Cage of Clavicus SE

Please note that some of these may need to have patches created for Northern Roads and/or The Great City of Winterhold, as I started adjusting my load order back to (slightly) more serious content recently and haven't yet thoroughly checked everything. I could probably actually go even further, but even without counting the reskins this post has 40 mods already and the length is starting to get unwieldy! I might go back and make another post with some additional mods in various categories later, but this should be a good start if nothing else.