Johnny101

joined 3 months ago
[–] Johnny101@lemmy.world 3 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Last time i tried to talk to them about how id been feeling they completely started blaming themselves for it. I didnt tell them much, just that having to constantly hear about their self harm habits is overwhelming and I often don't know how to respond to things. I do tell them I would miss them and that I enjoy spending time with them. But its so overwhelming because every single message I send to anyone I always overanalyze it to make sure it won't affect them negatively. I have frequent nightmares where my friends die of any circumstance and its always my fault. So I'm terrified of accidentally tipping them over the edge.

 

A little over a month ago my two best friends tried to kill themselves on the same night. Throughout the month one of those friends has done that several times. Thankfully they're both still alive today.

Ever since that happened I haven't felt like myself at all, I just, feel like I'm carrying too much and like I'm all alone. People know being suicidal is hard and loosing someone to suicide is hard but having someone you really care about try to kill themselves (and describe how they did it) can also be hard on anyone. I can't make a description of the event on this post but I can say that they didn't pull back, they didn't stop and turn back, they tried to go through and were stopped by an external source. For me that's the part that hurts the most. Knowing they wanted to go through with it.

Ever since it happened Ive been having intrusive thoughts/images about it and just feeling constantly stressed/irritable and having nightmares every now and them. Nightmares in either which I watch them hurt themselves or they die by some form and its my fault. I also had per-existing abandonment issues so before this happened I'd constantly wonder how I would feel if my friends died but the one thing that kept me grounded was knowing that that can't happen in any realistic scenario and now its happening.

Going through life I feel so different, like none of the people I see from day to day have gone through something like this so that makes me different, and if I told them what's going on in my head they'd see me as pathetic because I shouldn't feel this way since they're still alive.

I feel so isolated. Like I want someone, not anyone, but a close friend, who I can talk to about this, but then I remember I have three friends in this world, and two of them want to die. The third one I can talk to but wasn't affected the same way and doesn't really relate.

I don't really know what I'm asking through this post, I guess I just wanted to let it out. I guess I also want to know I'm not alone. Anyone else going through this?

[–] Johnny101@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

For me, a perfect life would be a job, any job, that keeps me afloat, a house to live in, even if its just a small apartment, and a few good friends.

[–] Johnny101@lemmy.world 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You can see it in his eyes. He's seen things....

[–] Johnny101@lemmy.world 18 points 1 month ago

I taught myself to not feel my feelings. I feel great now. Being depressed is better than being overly emotional and unstable.

[–] Johnny101@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago

I can't really give the best advice. A while ago I went through some things and decided to avoid all my friends. I remember, decpite my decision, I really would've loved if one of my close friends reached out. Idk about your friend though, everyone is different. If I were you I would definitely reach out. Make them understand that you really care about them.

[–] Johnny101@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Its nice to know im not the only Linux kid. It felt so weird, most of my friends didn't even know what Android was. It sucks growing up tech savvy when most people call themselves nerds after discovering "air drop".

[–] Johnny101@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I installed Linux for the first time at 14.

[–] Johnny101@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Oh my god thank you. I saw this exact image on another site, except the text said "I found the BIOS flavor." I was like "wtf this person has no idea what BIOS is" and proceeded to explain what it really was.

[–] Johnny101@lemmy.world 54 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Don’t downgrade to Windows 11, update to Linux

[–] Johnny101@lemmy.world 0 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Thats because they treat it like a toy, not a tool.

[–] Johnny101@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

I am completely against addictions, including those like algorithmic social media. I am also against people who dont understand tech blaming it instead of blaming the real problem. If we just took a second to understand it we would understand how to use it responsibly.

[–] Johnny101@lemmy.world 0 points 2 months ago (8 children)

Fucking conservatives in my opinion. Its not a bad way of spending time, its different. It has a different set of advantages and disadvantages. If you're too stupid to understand it, just stay away from it. But don't ruin it for the open minded people who are open to new ideas.

 

Ill be fine....

 

friend.com I’m sorry but I don’t think anyone is idiot enough to wear a device that is always listening to you and talking to you pretending to be your friend. This is a disaster waiting to happen. If social media was killing mental health, imagine what this will do.

 

As a young person myself, it is incredibly painful to watch my generation fall into shambles due to the influence of algorithmic social media. I've witnessed friends partake in dangerous trends, perpetuated by platforms designed to capture and hold the attention of its users at any cost. These platforms often present low-quality content that can be created by people as young as five years old, yet their impact is anything but juvenile. This consistent exposure is detrimental, leading to severe mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, and addiction. We need to take immediate action to put an end to what can only be described as digital narcotics.

Currently, over 95% of teenagers have access to a smartphone, and more than 45% say they are constantly online. The algorithmic nature of these platforms, which learn users' behaviors and preferences to keep them engaged, can easily turn into a trap that young minds may struggle to escape. The sense of obligation to stay connected and the fear of missing out only intensify the addictive nature of social media, ultimately impacting their emotional and psychological development.

To combat this, we propose a prohibition on the use of algorithmic social media platforms by individuals under the age of 18. This restriction is intended to provide a safe environment for our youth, free from the pressures and potentially harmful content that these algorithms perpetuate. Instead, we should encourage alternative digital spaces that foster learning, creativity, and genuine human interaction. For example, safer social media sites that don't implement engaging algorithms, like Mastodon, Lemmy, PeerTube, and many other federated platforms.

By implementing this ban, we are not trying to isolate youth from the harm of social media, but teach them to make responsible choices, and have fulfilling and healthy digital lives. This is not implementing that we should ban technology from teenagers, quite the opposite actually. Teach them to protect themselves and lead healthy digital lives, such as I have taught myself.

Sign this petition to demand stricter regulations on algorithmic social media access for minors and help us take the first step towards a safer, more mindful digital age.

Petition Link:

https://chng.it/pDf47R4Nts

 

I wouldn't normally go to the internet with something like this. My therapist is sick and I cant talk to my only close friend right now.

Last Monday I had a particularly bad day, so I started mindlessly ranting at my closest friend, something I normally do to deal with stress, they're good at listening. However, it took them hours to reply to my message, and when they did, they simply said "sorry." I knew something was off, it wasn't them to reply with a single one word message after hours of silence.

Fast forward Tuesday afternoon, I was a little concerned about them but mostly fine. I was busy with work anyways. Then they texted me saying that they hadn't been at work for Monday and Tuesday, and but otherwise "Its nothing, Dw about me". At that point I was worried sick and I almost had a full breakdown.

I late texted them asking if they were really okay and they kept insisting they were. Ofc I didn't believe them, because they were acting very off and it didn't make sense that they didn't want to tell me. We've exchanged very personal secrets in the past.

Its now Wednesday. I restrained myself from talking to them all day, figuring they needed space. I can't find a way to distract myself, and my paranoid brain is trying to come up with every possible worst case scenario. The stress is consuming me, I barely feel anything outside the situation with my friend, I cant be productive with anything, I have really high blood pressure and intense heart rate.

Last night around 1 am I ended my conversation with my friend simply saying "Thank you" after I told them how much I care. I haven't talked to them all day, and if I dont say anything Ill be completely consumed by the stress. I figure I want to say something like "how are you doing" though they've made it obvious that they dont want to tell me about it. If I start with something more innocent like "did you sleep last night" they could take it the same way. One would say to speak from the heart but in that case all I want to say is "I love you" which could get awkward because we're opposite genders but really just friends. I just want advice really. I can deal with the stress, as hard as it may be. What should I tell them? How can I not push them to talk about something they dont want to while still helping them?

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