Seems like a good trade off. 2 years in prison < 18 years in prison. Anyway, fuck Nebraska.

As an accountant, I assure you that I advised the stakeholder about the risks and possible outcomes of their actions first. I’m out of it now, but working for privately owned small to midsize businesses was a trip…

I don’t even value me, no corporation gives a crap. They want you and your recurrent income.

I’d love to, “but I work a 9 to 5, so I’d like to fight crime from, like, 6 to 9.”

In my day, I used to sweep for mines when I was bored. It was difficult, and I would often have to guess when I saw large numbers. Anyway, if I got stuck, i would just start playing Solitaire!

Yup, I gave up my 70 hour work weeks. My 50 hour weeks grew my salary and position, then my 60 hour weeks put me in charge of massive projects, which drove me to 70 hours during a couple ERP implementations. I took a paycut overall, but now I work 40 hours.

For a meager $18000/year with copays and premiums. Murica!

Listen, someone here has to represent the hatred and greed of the megachurches. Reminder to tithe so that Kenneth Copeland can outfit his 18000 square ft tax free estate. For Jesus, of course.

“I bought you flours.”

But the other professions don’t need to defend themselves against blatant racism and abuse of power. “This is a dangerous profession, which is why we shot an unarmed black teenager 117 times.”

Might I offer you an “And so it goes…” in these trying times?

“This shirt is dry clean only. That means it’s dirty!” - Mitch Hedberg