I love smacking an unmovable object. Especially one that jiggles.

You just heard the lightning bolt, and now the theme song is pumping in yo head

There must have been at least one crappy one though, statistically speaking

Love myself a cool, arctic breeze

Bet it's windy

I heard they found the manifesto with three copies of the Sims

If you want to find out who rules over you, discover first who you aren't allowed to criticise

I'm a peer. I pee at least 6 times a day; more if I'd had a lot of water that day. Can I review it?

Treasonous dogs

Instagram should have been a weed delivery service

It's truly a shame that no one stepped up to help contribute to the project

I like how the genie looks like Salvador Dali