Whether or not that stat is true, I don't think that minority representation should be accurately reflected based on the percentage of the population the minority represents. Just as an example, if we're talking about television shows, and let's just throw out a number that there are 100 major characters across all of the major networks/most watched shows. That would mean all LGBTQ+ representation is contained to 5 characters.. The chance of any one non-invested viewer seeing those characters becomes minimal -- which means that both cishet folks aren't getting exposed to minority representation (something that helps normalize us), and LGBTQ+ folks aren't getting exposed to minority representation (something that helps our own confidence and mental health).
Yeah, these replies are not at all what I expected to see coming into this thread. When did we decide that this is enough representation, and why did no one ask me?
I have never wished a man dead, but I have read some obituaries with great pleasure.
Absolutely.
Discovering that I was trans was the start of a long journey for me -- one that I'm not very proud of how it started, with suppressing it for the first decade or so out of fear of losing the people and things I cared most about. But I'm here now, I'm out, I'm transitioning, and I honestly had no idea that life could feel this good.
Hey, just wanna say I really appreciated that video, thanks for sharing!
Agreed. I'm doing my damnedest not to catastrophize, but it's hard when one of the two major political parties in this country is running on a platform specifically demonizing and targeting my community and people like me in particular.
Honestly, I was more frustrated with the spinner of doom that kept me from actually submitting my registration for a few days. That meant re-writing my response to that application question until I decided to just save it in notepad until I was able to get a registration form actually submitted.
The "interview" process itself makes total sense, and I'm happy to have even something so simple that helps keep some of the low-effort riff-raff out.
As someone diagnosed with ADHD as an adult, my first response is "wait, did we not already know this?"
Seriously, reliance on a lot of caffeine is such a typical way for ADHD folks to self-medicate, especially prior to being diagnosed.
I'm not sure where my folks stand, so thanks for creating this thread. :)
I've come out to them, and they said, ostensibly, the right things. "We love you and want you to be happy, whatever that looks like." But then the rest of the weekend I was with them they proceeded to act like the conversation never happened and made no attempt to use the correct name and pronouns.
Fingers crossed, the next visit with them goes better. I'm prepared to do some gentle corrections this time, now that they've had some time to mull on it.
Hi friend!
I see a lot of my younger self in your post, if that helps at all.
I came out in my late 30's, after living life relatively comfortably as a guy (at least by outward appearances. By the time I came out I was starting to be a bit of a wreck inside.)
There were similar feelings and thoughts to what you describe. Often looking at women and thinking "goddamn, why do they get to look so pretty and I'm stuck like this?" or wishing I could have the same kind of fashion choices available that they do. I didn't spend any time watching trans porn content, but I did a lot of reading of transformation erotica. The idea of something or someone sort of "forcing" that transformation from a guy to a girl, and them having to learn to live with it (and secretly finding out they love it) was like crack to me. After a while, it wasn't even the smutty parts I was looking for -- they were fun, but I'd often skip over them to get to the next bit of plot so I could get that vicarious thrill.
By all outward appearances, I was a happy, regular dude -- a relatively successful one at that. I was married, had a dog and a house and a good relationship with my parents and a decent job and group of friends. And I could have probably kept living that way for longer, if I had to. But it ate me up inside. Once I had the thoughts you're having now, it got worse for me; I realized that what I was dealing with might be gender-related and might be dysphoria.
I pushed it away then. I thought "I can't have that, I'd lose everything I care about, all that stuff I worked so hard for." I stuffed it down and pretended I didn't feel it and, for a time, it went away. At first those feelings went away, for months even. But eventually, they came back, and when they did, I'd struggle with them. I'd get down in the dumps for a day or two before I could push it back down and away again. Turns out that it was a repeating cycle for me, each time they'd come back more quickly, and each time the feelings would hit me harder and stronger and I'd be stuck with them for longer before I could finally dispel them. The last time it did that I was depressed for a month or more, to the point that my wife started seriously worrying and told me that she felt almost like she didn't know who I was anymore, that she couldn't recognize what I was thinking or feeling and she was scared.
A week or two later I came out to her as maybe non-binary or genderfluid. Another week or two later I started therapy. Within a month, I'd accepted that yes, I'm trans, and I need to transition if I want a shot at being happy.
Sorry, I'm rambling a bit. What I'm trying to say is don't let it get as far along as I did. You're having these thoughts and questions, they're okay to have. This isn't something to feel shameful about. Seek out a good therapist that specializes in gender identity, and talk to them about it. Maybe try new pronouns out in a small, safe group. Explore, and see what feels right for you. You'll be okay. :)
And I'm saying that's a bogus reason to ban trans women from women's sports. If their advantage is no greater than that of the advantages between cis women, then including medically transitioned trans women in women's sports does not un-level the playing field.
ETA: The way that we control for the testosterone-fueled changes a trans woman's body undergoes in puberty is by requiring them to be on HRT (including T suppressors) for a long enough amount of time that those advantages become negligible and they can fairly compete with other athletes, not by outright banning them. It's ridiculous and more than a little offensive to act like outright banning trans women from high level competition is the right thing to do.
I've limited my Reddit usage purely to subreddits that I can't find a reasonable substitution for. Lemmy is small, a bit complicated to get at first, so naturally there's going to be some communities that just aren't going to make it here. For me really, I go back to participate in r/ChangeMyView and r/AskTransgender.
The first to help provide a voice for trans folk in the seemingly ceaseless threads about trans people, and the second (more important one) to hopefully provide advice or information to people who're just trying to figure things out. It's a tiny little way I can give back and hopefully help at least one person here and there, so I'm not going to give that up just because Reddit itself has shit the bed.