altphoto

joined 2 days ago
[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 3 points 16 hours ago

What could this guy do that could be illegal and punishable? What?

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 1 points 17 hours ago

OK sharks, I want to present to you an invention that will blow your minds away! We'll get to why in a moment.

First let's remember that day in 2025 when we could no longer dependent on toilet paper being readily available.

So I ask you, what did you do? Did you instinctively go to Amazon to buy a bidet only to find that it simply splashes your butt? With water of all things?

LOL! Well suffer no longer! Introducing the water stick! You simply turn it on and you brush it against your bum. Its powerful surface jets will effectively shoot any remaining brown matter right off! Just look at all the included attachments for the perfect paperless cleaning!

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 3 points 17 hours ago

One dey, I'm gonna be setting on my Kawch watching my Gynese Teebee with HayAy tachmology. Watching the most famous moobies on Nezflik. Movies such as large reptile marine world and the Jacobian a movie where a man learns about mathematical transpose and its fight against the finite element army. And the keeds can watch eskubee Dude! Its a car tuned like a large Dough that bites kraim.

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 3 points 17 hours ago

What are you gonna do? Meow me to deaf? Is that even legal? It looks like a semiautomatic cat. My god, the 2nd amendment is being distorted.

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 3 points 19 hours ago (2 children)

I'm afraid. Lol phones with non replaceable batteries suck.

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 2 points 19 hours ago

Yes! The all new Nabisco BPA coated BPS tainted leaded chocolate treats! Totally safe!

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 8 points 19 hours ago (4 children)

Yup. My current one is dying and I'm using it almost always wired to a charger or battery. I don't care how badly they try to waste my battery, I'm not buying a new Android phone ever. If this one dies, I'm prepared to not use a phone until there's a reasonably priced Linux phone.

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 2 points 19 hours ago

If you decorate your socks, you'll never lose them again!

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 6 points 20 hours ago

He probably was murdered or badly hurt. So that's probably why...they can't habeas corpus.

[–] altphoto@lemmy.today -5 points 20 hours ago (9 children)
[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 2 points 20 hours ago

No!, I say Rip, not reap.

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