Hey look this guy is a carnifex fucker
drolex
joined 2 years ago
Oh my god how did you know?
Seriously amazing, I love it. Condolences to your brain though, it must take its toll.
You've got zeugma
Refusing to accept
Much writing, very words.
Hey guys guess where I will do a backflip tonight lmao 🤣
This depicts very precisely how I feel crossing roads in the US and Canada.
Compare and contrast with what happened in my town in SW France:
- Council installed one of those super secure crossings that take forever to let people cross the street. Twice if you want to cross diagonally
- Some old people don't give a shit because they must be thinking that life is too short for this, and they yolo it
- Most drivers stop but some are unattentive
- A couple of accidents happen
- The old people lobby give some shit to the mayor
- A different crossing is installed that stops the drivers all the time
- Most drivers are OK, the shitty ones are angry
- Everybody nice profits, another victory for the old gits who cross when and where they want. They'll do it again
Upon seeing the blood stained clothes, the disciple said 'Hey I was hungry, too! Fucking weirdo.'
The disciple was named Colonel Sanders and this was his inspiration to invent the hamberder and never be hungry again.
The fool asks 'What?'
The wise man interjects 'What'
The enlightened silently nods and thinks 'WTAF'
Woah, it's like Speed 2 only with a bus instead of a boat
All serious scientists agree that an ankylosaurus air-dropped by a quetzalcoatlus would absolutely wreck both rex and spino.
Imma rape you and eat your lungs, you subhuman n-word r-word c-word, etc.
🤓📚👉🦋 Is this human thought? If only I had robot coworkers!
"Honey you're being hysterical". Works every time. Just add some mansplaining and she'll come to her senses. Might want ot refer to "that time of the month" to seal the deal.
Yeah my mother won't talk to me, how do you know?