The Onion is truly redundant

cross-posted from: https://scribe.disroot.org/post/10152961

Fines issued to Russian drivers for parking and stopping violations while they waited in line for gasoline will be canceled, Interior Ministry spokeswoman Irina Volk said.

“In each such case, all regional traffic police divisions of Russia’s Interior Ministry will issue decisions to cancel the fines, given the minor nature of the offense or the fact that the driver was acting out of urgent necessity,” she said.

...

The move follows complaints from residents of the Saratov region about fines issued to drivers waiting in line for gasoline. Automated enforcement systems in the region had been recording parking and stopping violations near gas stations. As of July 1, Volk said, those systems have been switched off.

...

Archived

Archive: [ https://archive.is/NzDOX ]

JD Vance sought last week to use a military helicopter to ferry himself and his son across Washington for a golf lesson, one of a number of allegedly unusual travel requests that has left the Republican’s security detail “fed up,” MS Now reports.

The alleged travel plans aboard Marine Two were ultimately canceled due to weather, but Secret Service agents nonetheless discussed it among themselves unhappily, according to the outlet.

Past vice presidents have had Secret Service agents drive their children to activities, rather than use military hardware, which can cost tens of thousands of dollars per hour to operate.

How is this not crossposted yet?

BORK!BORK!BORK! Paris might sometimes be called "The City of Light" or perhaps "The City of Love" by the romantically inclined. Judging by this hotel's elevators, "The City of Bork" is more appropriate.

Spotted by eagle-eyed Register reader Nathaniel in a Paris hotel, what we assume to be digital signage is instead stalled on the all too familiar American Megatrends BIOS configuration screen. The computer behind the scenes also seems a bit overpowered to serve information for hotel services.

Instead of enticing elevator riders into the undoubtedly delightful bars and restaurants of the establishment (apparently a Novotel not far from the Eiffel Tower) or whatever it should be doing, this screen has temptations of an altogether more technical nature.

A CometLake CPU? An i5 no less? Sort of up-to-date. And that 8 GB of RAM? The way memory prices are going, that might be enough to buy you a nice hotel room in some cities, and at least a decent coffee and a croque monsieur in Paris.

Well... it beats eating it, I suppose!

Gracias, pero no.

It's in Not the Onion because Hegseth has a history of leaking information because of his alcohol problem

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_government_group_chat_leaks

Of course it is. Of course.

(As I've had posts removed from this community before for not being oniony and so am not sure what the standards are: I think this is oniony because I find it highly ironic that a company would ever make an effort to delete code examples that supplement their own work, and think it could reasonably be part of a satirical headline satirizing copyright enforcement. If mods disagree that this is oniony enough, that's fine with me too.)