throwawaysalami

joined 4 months ago
[–] throwawaysalami@discuss.online 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Then how do you give proper signals that you like someone?

[–] throwawaysalami@discuss.online 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Then how do you properly give signals of liking the other person? Do I genuinely need to be blunt and just say I like her? Do I need to just straight up ask her out on a date? Do I need to flirt? As in use pick up lines or something?

P.s. please don't tell me to just be myself.

[–] throwawaysalami@discuss.online 4 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

How will her knowing I like her make her feel differently?? That doesn't make sense to me. I'm still me, I am not doing anything differently, I am still as "attractive" as I was before telling her. So I don't see how it matters.

Edit: Granted, eventually I'll have to tell her but that's after hanging out a couple of times and she's shown signs of liking me back

[–] throwawaysalami@discuss.online 0 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (3 children)

How the fuck are you not getting signals from someone and still hoping to “attract” them?

No, see that's where you give up. If you're not getting signals from them then you leave it at that.

If you’re unable to make a connection enough to where you’re seen by a specific person as attractive, then you haven’t done enough to be noticed by that person.

I don't see how simply stating you like someone will make you any more attractive. Hence, I don't agree with the just shoot your shot approuch among other reasons. If you ask me, I would take that as a sign they're not interested.

It means (as far as my interpretation goes) getting on friendly terms (not to be confused with becoming friends) and see if they show signs of liking you back.

[–] throwawaysalami@discuss.online 2 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (10 children)

Also, don’t be afraid to shoot your shot, OP.

If I may respond to this and no disrespect intended when I say this: I do not agree at all with this sentiment, to just shoot your shot. With all due respect, but if you're not getting signals from her it will only serve to embarrass you.

[–] throwawaysalami@discuss.online 3 points 2 days ago (2 children)

What does that mean? (Unless you're making a joke I'm not getting.)

[–] throwawaysalami@discuss.online 8 points 2 days ago (8 children)

Well in my case, there is this girl I like. I am not much of a flirt and even then I don't really think flirting would work. So I'm just going to try to Attract rather then Chase in that sense.

 

Edit: 'Chase' in this phrase is not meant to be taken literally.

For some extra information on the quote: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/compassionate-feminism/202504/the-psychology-of-dont-chase-attract

[–] throwawaysalami@discuss.online 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Tinder and night club people.

[–] throwawaysalami@discuss.online 5 points 2 months ago

Alright, I'm going with this.

[–] throwawaysalami@discuss.online 5 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (4 children)

Does she expect a serious answer?

That's what I'm asking here. Do they generally expect a serious answer or not?

 

I need to tell someone off but I already know I'm going to be close to tears when I do. And I don't want her to see me crying.

And please spare me any mention of how it is okay to cry. That's not why I'm here.

[–] throwawaysalami@discuss.online 2 points 4 months ago

Well the thing is, like I said, if it were up to me I'd have no relationship and just sleep around. But I only ever seem to able to get relationships, never a fling. So I tell the women I date I don't want anything too attached.

 

This will be a little controversial so please keep in mind this is c/nostupidquestions.

I feel like any relationship is, at its core, an agreement. An agreement between two people to spend their time, affection and dedication solely to each other. By virtue of their feelings for each other. This is normal.

However if it were truly up to me. I would just sleep with another girl every day of the week. I honestly don't really care about spending time with her all that much. In fact, if I'm brutally honest. For me a relationship is a mean to get sex and I guess spending some time with her isn't all that bad either. I am perfectly willing to stick to one woman. That is no problem to me whatsoever. But is this a healthy way of doing relationships?

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