Comradeship // Freechat

I want an avi with a trans flag or symbol in the background.

I can always use Canva, I suppose, but what should my avi be, dammit? I want Kirby but Kirby's a boy, I think.

I want a girl avatar.

Someone came through and helped me recently, which I am really grateful for. After buying shower boots to use after my surgery, multiple packs of bandages, and paying for hospital transport for my next three surgeries, it's all used up.

My surgical wounds are infected again and I also have another three surgeries coming up (next one this Tuesday coming) so this will be a recurring issue for a while. I need some iodine patches, ointment and powder to treat this. I will gladly accept help in whatever form - either someone ordering them and sending them to me (the patches are available on amazon and the other items on ebay) or sending help to my paypal account so I can buy them. I can't buy anything for myself because of my disability payments having been stopped while I go through appeal.

The patches are £7 a box on amazon right now, the powder is £9.90 on ebay and the ointment is £19.90. The wounds have gotten infected after every surgery and with three more coming up, it's very likely to happen again so I may need multiple of each item.

My paypal is the_mighty_tabs@hotmail.co.uk

If you're able to help by paypal please write a message in the box that it's a gift so I can prove to the DWP (British benefit Nazis) that I haven't been working and earning money. If I win my benefit appeal they will check my accounts. I'm allowed to receive gifts but not earn money.

If anyone is able to order the items and send them to me please PM me.

This was my fourth of these surgeries and it's gotten infected every time. The first time I got antibiotics, which involves sitting in A&E all day long waiting to be seen, and then dealing with the side effects of the antiobiotics. The second surgery it got infected again and I amazingly managed to get a nurse appointment at the GP, they put iodine on it and it worked perfectly. But I had to pay for the iodine patches they used (with help from someone here), it's not even covered by my medical exemption certificate. (Because GP surgeries are independent contractors). So when it got infected again the next time I just asked someone to send me the iodine. They did, I used it and it worked. No sitting in a&e all day, no side effects and no having to pay for whatever the nurse used.

These surgeries are to debride and clean infected ulcers caused by my cancer treatment. The actual surgeries are free on the NHS but the patient has to pay for their own bandages, transport and whatever else they may end up needing like antiseptic.

It's very hard to grasp what it's like to live with a disability until you've experienced it yourself. I think it's not something people just think about, and it's also just not easy to imagine even when you try to.

So here's what it's like. You live life day-to-day. You wake up in the morning knowing that you're gonna have difficulties getting through the day - depending on your disability, you might be thinking "is today gonna be a good day, or a bad day?" (that's the good one) or you might think "here we go again".

You start to plan your appointments ahead so they don't all fall on the same day, or even in the same week. Doing more than one big thing a day? Impossible. You can't go to the doctor, get groceries, and then head to your friends house. You do one thing a day tops, so you have to plan your entire week ahead accordingly. No more spur of the moment things like a friend calling you at 5PM asking if you want to grab drinks at their place, because you already did something else today and you don't have it in you to do anything else.

When the appointment comes you have some hope that you'll be able to get through it fine, but you're not optimistic. You'd rather not go because it's torturous, but the pros outweigh the cons so you still go. What used to take 10-15 minutes to do now takes 45, and you're tortured the entire time.

There are many things you need to do, like say renewing your driver's license, getting your teeth checked, getting new clothes, but you don't get around to it because you know it's gonna be torture and so you put it off for as long as you can, sometimes forever. (thankfully we have online shopping, even if it doesn't solve everything).

In my case because of my disability the kind of stuff I have to pick is if I'm going to brush my teeth, wash my hair or shave my beard. You can only do one, so plan accordingly. That's the kind of decisions I have to make daily. I'm going to brush my teeth tonight and wash my hair tomorrow, I think. But not both at once, that's impossible.

People ask you about moving out, finding a girlfriend, getting a job... you have to stop them. They don't understand because this is so alien to them. My life is focused on getting through the day, one day at a time. Currently, this is slightly more manageable -- I'm "lucky" that my disability seems to have some triggers, so I can usually stay at home without too many issues (so long as I mostly do no physical effort). Getting a job or moving out is so far out of my mind that I don't even think about it. There's no point thinking about it, because there's no answer for it. I would just be torturing myself over what my life used to be like.

To be clear I don't mind my friends talking about their lives. I'm happy to hear and talk to them about it. But there is no point in asking me about what I want to do in life when my day-to-day is thinking stuff like can I cook lunch without puking? Can I water my plants without puking? Oh, I'm expecting a delivery tonight and I know putting away groceries is one of my triggers (for some reason), so I probably should take it easy today until then, so I can put the fucking groceries away like an adult.

And then on top of that people will judge you and downplay your disability. "Just get over it", "just live with it" or "just push through and do it". I do live with it, I don't have any choice but to live with it. What takes you 10 minutes takes me 30, every time and for everything. Your commute to work sucks? Mine would suck just the same, except it would take me twice as long and the entire time it's also taking all I have in me to not throw up on the side of the road. It's dangerous to drive for too long because if I get into an episode while driving (which happens a lot) I stop paying as much attention to the road. I try not to drive during rush hour.

And the worst part is that it's not visible. People see you and assume everything is fine, so they talk to you normally while you're standing here not listening, thinking about nothing but not throwing up. They give you appointments during rush hour. They ask you to come in for an appointment that will last 5 minutes, but takes you 45 to get ready to. They see you stop walking and breathe deeply and wonder wtf is wrong with you. They talk to you like they talk to anyone else, because there's nothing about you that screams "I am this close to throwing up right now if you don't stop". And so they don't believe you have a real problem, because they don't see it. If they know you have it, they forget over time and assume you just got better. They don't check up on you, because they've seen you at times when you were doing better and assume you're cured now.

Everyone always comes with their advice, hoping there is some sudden cure that exists, because science has all the answers in the modern day. but nobody ever asks you how you cope, what they can do to avoid triggering you, or what it's like for you. They might concede you have a disability, but it's not a real disability. It doesn't count. The threshold for what counts is so high, nobody would ever be disabled if they applied this standard to everyone.

Communists are generally better about this.

For example Azeris, Turkmens, Tajiks transitioning from the Arabic script, and Buryats from the Mongol script.

And why wasn't there a cyrillisation of Georgian and Armenian?

To me the script changes seemed unnecessary, but I'm curious what you think

I'm a thyroid cancer patient, amongst other health issues. I've been having endless problems with the dosage of my meds and all the side effects, it's ruined my life. However I have to fight tooth and nail for any medical help. Every time my blood tests suggest my levels are stable, the endocrinologist immediately discharges me, regardless of my symptoms. When the symptoms become unbearable again I have to go through a whole rigmarole to get an appointment again, often waiting up to a year on the waiting list.

Now my GP surgery makes it almost impossible to get a GP appointment too. You're supposed to request an appointment via their new app, but you need to be a tech wizard to work out how to use it. They don't take phone calls for booking appointments any more. The only thing to do then is turn up at 8.30am when they open and get in the queue of weary desperate souls and hope there is still an appointment left by the time you reach the front of the queue. 9 times out of 10, there are none left. You just get turned away without help. If there are any appointments the receptionist can't even book one. You get put on a triage list and a doctor will contact you later and decide whether you need an appointment.

On Friday I woke up to find a very noticeable bald patch at the front of my head. Another one appeared a few days later. My hair is literally falling out in clumps. You don't get chemo for thyroid cancer (the treatment for this is arguably even worse) so that is not why my hair is falling out. I don't know why it is, but it can't be a good sign.

I had to phone the endocrinologist's office multiple times and speak to multiple people over several days before they finally agreed to book me in for an appointment. It's a month away but the NHS is such a shambles I feel lucky to get one so soon. I also spent days trying to get a GP appointment and after all the queueing and begging and waiting on the triage list, finally I got one. It was useless.

The doctor was some random locum (all the usual GPs have retired and they never get full time staff now, just different locums each day) who didn't care a bit and was clearly just there for money. I asked for blood tests to determine the cause of hair loss - after all it could be something serious and better caught early. He said "We don't know what causes hair loss and there are no blood tests for it." Then sent me away with a steroid shampoo and nothing else.

I got home and googled it and there are blood tests for it, many as it could be caused by thyroid issues, autoimmune, adrenals, deficiencies and many other things. I wanted these tests but I knew they would never agree. So I had to employ subterfuge to get medical help. I told the receptionist that I had an endo appointment and the endo had requested these tests. So they did them. Don't have the results yet.

It's so exhausting having to fight for every little bit of medical help, especially when I am unwell. And it's getting more and more difficult all the time. A recent news report said just 12% of GP appointments are now face to face - the rest of the time it's by phone. And that's for the things the GP will actually deal with. They no longer deal with muscular-skeletal issues, they tell you to refer yourself to the physiotherapist for that (and spend 4 months on the waiting list). They won't see you for infections - you have to go to the pharmacy and the pharmacist will prescribe antibiotics. And many other things. It's like they are gradually closing down healthcare altogether.

The British politician, Rachel Reeves, has tried to do everything she can to mass-murder the disabled. She's tried really hard to cut and eliminate disability payments for as many of the most vulnerable in society as possible. She has tried to freeze the elderly by taking away their winter fuel allowance and she has tried to put a limit on how much social care people are allowed to receive in their lifetimes. She has to cut down the government's spending, and she is doing her best to direct all the cuts at the elderly, sick and disabled, although other MPs have fought back against her and put the brakes on at least some of her plans. All this while MPs just awarded themselves a payrise that amounts to millions each year.

Yesterday Rachel Reeves was seen crying in the House of Commons. Suddenly people are pouring out sympathy for her and scolding those who aren't sympathetic. I'm sorry, this woman has just tried to murder thousands of elderly, sick and disabled people through impoverishing them and we're supposed to feel sorry for her because she cried?

This country is insane and evil.

cross-posted from: https://lemmygrad.ml/post/8395651

cross-posted from: https://lemmygrad.ml/post/8395650

cross-posted from: https://lemmygrad.ml/post/8395649

cross-posted from: https://lemmygrad.ml/post/8395648

cross-posted from: https://lemmygrad.ml/post/8395647

I don't particularly care about the cost or the hoops I have to jump through, I primarily want the best and most effective VPN's.

I'm also a heavy gamer, so the ones that are most excellent and allow for the least minimal delay when playing online multiplayer/live-service games, would be what I'm looking for.

And while this last one is optional, I would prefer if the recommend VPN's are also usable in the U.S., so I could set them up before I move to Chengdu.

I'm aware I could likely change VPN's, but that could be a headache or a hassle, so I'd rather stick with one. Unless I would have to compromise on quality/ VPN effectiveness.

Also, the more cost efficient for the value, the better. But I primarily care about quality rather than cost effectiveness.

Kind of a shitpost fyi, but since all humans initially had dark skin (more melanin) and only slowly got fairer skin (less melanin) in regions with less UV radiation in the northern hemisphere, would this also be reversable?

How long does it usually take to see these changes in mammals? Probably thousands of years right?

I mean it would kind of solve racism if we don't have a political system by then that treats all humans like humans.

Please don't take this post too seriously I just had this idea of a white supremacist having an identity crisis due to having more darker skinned children because of climate change haha (Insert some joke about Yakubian apes here)

I've been seeing lately that everything I've posted appears twice when I press the create button. ????

I'm just going to list about a dozen works here, if you've read any of them I just wanna know some of your (Spoilers free) thoughts on them. You don't have to write a full review, even just a thumbs up or thumbs down is good. However I'm not just asking to have someone decide for me, I just want to be more informed before i delve into things, from more...ideologically coherent people. And obviously you don't have to say anything about the ones you haven't seen/read.

The list:

Road to Reality-Roger Penrose

Elements-Euclid

Bertrand Russel in general (honestly can't quite get a read on the guy to tell if going to get anything from him)

Peacock cries- Hong Ying

The Bathing woman-Tie Ning

Eileen Chang in general (I saw some of her books at a library and thought they looked interesting, wouldn't mind knowing where to start)

Water Margin- Shi Nai'an

Journey to the west- Wu Cheng'en

The Plum in the Golden Vase-Lanling Xiaoxiao Sheng

Arsenal military academy (the TV show. Idk if there's something else by the same name)

A sacred and terrible air-Robert Kurvitz

(I want to read House of Leaves and Ulysses too. I'll ask about them while I'm here but I dont need to be persuaded to read them)

I'm sure I'm forgetting some, I'll add them in an edit if I remember. Thanks in advance

Look, I know how this is going to come off, but this has been inside me for a while and I just want to get it off my chest.

To preface, yes, I know, boo hoo for me I get to live in the imperial core and not starve and live in a home rather than a shack or be completely homeless. My point isn't to pretend that I'm the saddest sob story to exist.

Anyway, I just feel like I'm just...idk, a villain? That's not the right word for it. But when people talk about the labor aristocracy and such, I get it. I get that I and others have better lives than the global south specifically because of their exploitation. But at the same time I don't feel as privileged as online discourse would have me believe. I mean, I'm certainly more privileged than barefoot malnourished miners in the DRC, but it's still hard. My entire family works and are proles in some form, even my semi-retired grandma. My entire upbringing has been focussed on making do with what we have. I have trauma from my mom getting fired. My health is poor, and I havent been able to see a dentist or doctor in years. And what we do have we try to give away. We housed another family when they were about to be homeless.

And again, I can't say this enough, I know I'm not the most oppressed person. I know there are more important topics and such.

It's just that, I can't be happy about this getting worse. Obviously I want the empire to fall, and that entails things getting worse. But I'm not happy about that being the reality. And I'm certainly not "Bourgeois-ified" or whatever.

I guess my point is, I just feel overwhelmed sometimes. Materially I'm squeezed by poverty and overwork, and psychologically I'm constantly reminded that I have it good, somehow, and yet that i don't deserve to have it good. That everyone hates me, and they're probably right to do so.

I don't know, I'm going to bed, I just don't wanna wake up

cross-posted from: https://hexbear.net/post/5441490

I'm already past due for that $260 fine, and I'm potentially in deep shit if I don't pay it soon

I’m on probation, the main stipulation being stay out of trouble. Violating my probation potentially means up to a year in jail.

It’s $260. I’m homeless with no source of income, which of course the court refused to take into consideration.

You can send it to either my CashApp, Venmo, or my friend’s PayPal (pruvenllc@gmail.com).

Anything helps. Thank you.

I've seen it happen in Europe but specially in Spain once and again since 2011. It's not his actual intentions what you must be wary about, or whether he has sincere Dem allegiance or not. What you must worry is the fact that even as a classic defender of Democratic Socialism he simply won't be able to do much, not in this day and age, an that has consequences.

As an example of one of his viral videos, he says legal systems for expropriating exist in NY, but that doesn't matter much because he will either be blocked from his usage or the results will be reversed by the state. There are a lot of laws that sound revolutionary in liberal democracies, but he keeps talking as if the capitalist state is neutral and will simply let him use them liberally, maybe because he underestimates a local administration: it's waaay more constrained than territorial ones. Here in Barcelona we had the main street activist for affordable housing Ada Colau as a mayor for 8 years, she tried haaard, not only didn't she compensate the market's tendency, it actually got so much worse.

This is a weird illusion that would vanish if they looked closely at other leftist projects's "success" when ruling in liberal democracies, it's the sad eagerness of democratic leftists to get harder-faster-stronger results in order to convince voters in a system that surely sometimes conceded, like in your FDR's time, but nowadays simply makes sure that those results are tiny, never enough to keeping their voters encouraged, much less even dare compensate the tide of capitalism significantly.

Meanwhile, he'll be drowned in fake news from all buyable media (which most of his voter base follow) and fake legal accusations that the state will push as far as they can. They don't need him in jail, all they need is the thousands of "common sense" Dem casuals that vote for him to see him tarnished, put in the defensive, ugly, like another celebrity. I've seen relevant leftist politicians destroyed by fake accusations of covering their old ex who came up to be a pedophile. You'll see him grow 10 years old for every 4 of governance in exchange for poor results.

But the worst effect this process has is demobilizing leftists on a wider sense. It happened with Syriza in Greece and Podemos in Spain, because liberal democracy is still the main hope/cope for most leftists and when their rare successes fail miserably it drags them down for a decade, plummeting all wide working class organizing, specially unions.

That's why revolutionary communists sent their guys to liberal parliaments with reforms as a nice complement, but agitation as the main objective.

[I assume there's a lot of rationalization in this "analysis", I'm not that well read on marxism, please feel free to correct any overly opinionated take.]

https://www.reddit.com/r/InformedTankie/s/49AstffS4Y

cross-posted from: https://hexbear.net/post/5417901

I recently went to court for a 4 year old “criminal trespassing” warrant. I pled guilty in exchange for 18 months of bench probation and a $260 fine (even though I’m homeless and have no income).

So, because I’m homeless and have no source of income, I have no way of paying for it myself. It’s overdue now, in fact. I was supposed to pay it within 30 days.

Send it to my Venmo, not CashApp. Link.

Thanks.

A while ago, I was banned from a whatsapp group from a pro-Palestinian action group in my labour union. I was banned because of pocket typing, I accidentally uploaded a picture from my work back then, a bag of mail, to the chat. Maybe I also did something else I'm not aware of, but there's no way of knowing. After I was banned I tried to reach out to the moderator who banned me. I told him it was an accident but he never replied. A day later when I asked to get a reply back he still ghosted me. A couple of months later I asked again. Still no reply.

The action group seems to organise mostly on whatsapp. So I can't organise on the intersection of Palestine and union work anymore, an intersection I care about because of some bullshit ban which I never got a reason for.

I feel very angry about this every time the action group is mentioned because then I'm reminded of this shit. You can't take yourself seriously as an organisation if organisers can just ban you without clarifying why or without letting you explain yourself.

There's a reform of traffic laws where I live. A major talking point is that the penalties for offences will follow a scaling system, where if you keep committing them, the penalty increases. Penalties scale based on the severity of the crime. For example, parking on an illegal spot where you block public transport will net you a 350€ fine plus confiscation of your license for 70 days. Meanwhile, driving with over 1.1 g/l of alcohol in your blood will result in a 1200€ fine, losing your license for 180 days, plus 2 months to 5 years of prison time. If you get caught for that a second time, you lose your license for 7 years, and 10 more years if you do it a third time.

Some listed offences:

• Not respecting a stop sign

• Driving 50km/h over the limit

• Parking on a spot reserved for people with special needs

• Driving on a bus lane

• Using your phone while driving

• Driving under the influence (higher BAC leads to a higher fine)

• Driving without a seat belt (cars) or helmet (motorcycles)

Also, the default speed limit in residential areas will decrease to 30 km/h from 50 km/h, except in roads with at least two lanes per direction (or two lanes for one-way streets).

Yesterday, while walking, I saw a poster from an anarchist group bashing these reforms, saying that the new traffic laws are only focused on penalties and that the police will only enforce them on poor people. I will also quote one of their closing statements: "it's true that if the traffic laws were to be enforced for even some hours, cities would 'freeze'"

I hadn't given much thought to the changes to the laws, with my general idea being that they were a good change, but the poster got me thinking. Of course, penalties like these will disproportionately target poor people. Also, as leftists, we should be weary of excessively penalizing some crimes, focusing on the root cause instead. Year-long sentences for stealing food will not decrease similar thefts, but feeding people will.

However, there are no material conditions that cause someone to ignore a stop sign, scroll TikTok while waiting for the traffic lights, speak on the phone while driving or driving without a seat belt. At best you can make contrived arguments about people being on a rush to get to their jobs, but that's what it is; a contrived argument that probably applies to less than 1% of the offenses.

Drunk driving is also a big issue. I acknowledge that some people feel forced to do it because of the lack of good nightly public transport. However, no one is forcing them to drink over the limit and drive back, or stay up so late that they can't catch public transport on their way home, or not have a designated driver. Is wanting to have fun in a specific way a valid argument for risking your life, and worse, risking the life of other innocent bystanders?

Finally, their closing statement makes them sound like people that break traffic laws because "they know better" or "it's better this way" even when it's not and they're excessively selfish. It feels weird to side with the increased penalties and surveillance, but I've come to believe it is a broken clock moment.

What do you think?

It is what it is.

Like, it is considered one of the AES but you virtually never hear anything about it. Last I checked they were busy industrialising the country but that was it.

Honestly I really appreciate having a throwaway account to ask these sort of personal questions to other comrades in a well-meaning community.

Here's my living situation, regardless of current disability (still not gone btw if anything it's morphed now lol)

I'm 31 and live "at home" in that the house is technically my parents'. However, they themselves work and live abroad, so it's just me and my 2 brothers living there for most of the year. Parents come back once in a while to see family and hang out.

When people ask I try to remember and say my brothers and I are housemates, basically. I feel the word housemate/roommate has a more 'serious' tone, like more grown up lol than saying "I live with my brothers".

-- Before proceeding, what are your thoughts on this so far? --

I ask because now at 30 I feel that I'm "stuck" there, still living with my parents, even though they only come back a few times a year. I feel like I should outgrow this at my age, do everything like an adult, so I'm wondering what the good people of lemmygrad think when they hear about this living situation. Is it off-putting, is it smart, or do you just not care?

I feel like I'm still living in my childhood home, in my childhood town, with my parents, even though as a kid I only lived in that house for like 3 years before we moved away for work lol. I came back in 2012 and have been living here non-stop since then, I have never rented my own place or tried moving out. I think some part of me is scared of doing it, but that's another topic lol.

I guess it's a source of shame in some aspects to still be in that living situation at my age. It feels like people my age are having their own families, have been living alone and working since their 20s, and I'm here not ready to take the plunge at 31.

Despite this I remind myself that I'm otherwise completely independent, aside from the rent situation. Well, I don't pay all the bills but people don't need to know that lol, and it wouldn't be a huge dent to split the internet bill three-way. But I pay my personal bills (groceries, phone, health insurance etc). I also get access to the car they leave here but I fill the gas. I guess that's another source of shame, when I drive and friends ask about the car and they learn it's my parents car lol. I'm not sure they even care, but I feel like I'm not performing up to expectations, you know? Like I'm seen as a kid, or someone who refuses to grow up and take responsibilities.

And I totally forgot. I literally woke up this morning confused as hell with all the texts I was getting from family, when I unlocked my phone I saw all the “Happy Birthday” messages and realized I am a year older today!

I know we aren’t supposed to reveal our ages but I will say that I am not yet 30 but it’ll be really cool once I get there.

My spring/summer semester is also over which means I am free until September so thats nice. My male dog also started on fluoxetine for his terrible anxiety, so hopefully he does well. Overall I am trying to stay chill and happy now that a new year has started for me, from today I will finally have time to start up on my Russian language lessons too.

cross-posted from: https://hexbear.net/post/5393954

For those who didn’t know, I am a 29-year old gamer and college student. I was diagnosed with autism since early age.

I am very dependent on my pension and my aunt on my budget, however most of it went for food. So I have set this fundraising to help me cover college-related fees, free tuition couldn’t cover beyond intended purpose.

Ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/ahriboy/goal

PayPal: DM me

Please if you can spare anything, Thank you!

(For more information,questions, Or for any other ways to send donations/gift cards/etc. if any of the above options don’t work for you, please DM me!!!)