SpaceDogs

joined 3 years ago
 

Hello comrades!

For my seminar class I decided to do my research paper on Karl Marx, chronicling his migration journey around Europe until 1849 when he permanently settled in England. The overarching topic of this class is about migration during the age of revolutions and one of the last sources we have to read (the one I am presenting on) is about Marx in Paris, this is why I chose to write about him for my project.

I have yet to concoct a thesis, which is fine apparently as it is still early and I haven’t read anything. Because of that my professor told me to find a biography on Marx so I can know what he was doing bouncing around all the time, why he was doing so, what he was writing and who he was corresponding with. Like with any Marxist topic, I worry that certain sources I delve into will be really anti-communist and I would rather not waste my time on them if I can help it. I know biases are unavoidable but the less aggressive it is the better, I suppose.

If any of you could push me in the right direction on which biography, or biographies, to read I would really appreciate it.

[–] SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.ml 13 points 2 weeks ago

Broke my heart seeing the news this morning. Such an inspiring comrade and amazing historian. He is now in the Great Lecture Hall in the Sky.

[–] SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.ml 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Is Harvard really that good?

[–] SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.ml 27 points 1 month ago (6 children)

I always felt that the only way the US would change for the better is through war on US soil. I do not want that to happen but considering the history of that country, it’s the only language that is listened to. I probably sound terrible, but I just do not know how else to word this.

[–] SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.ml 30 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (11 children)

Okay so this is terrifying. I feel like we are nosediving into something incredibly big but I also do not want to sound paranoid. Is the US really willing to fight a war with Mexico? Right at the US border?

[–] SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.ml 7 points 1 month ago

I have been in the fandom space for many years, since I was a young teenager, and in my experience I have only ever see this discourse happen on twitter (it happens on Tumblr too but to a much lesser extent). I wonder if it has to do with COVID, more people came online and I know there has been an uptick in media literacy issues which adds to the problem.

I see people, specifically fandom “veterans”, talk about how a lot of “normal” fans got involved in fandom spaces during COVID and it led to clashes as people do not seem to understand the etiquette. I do not like using the word “normal,” but its the only term I can think of to describe people who watch TV/movies/read books and then move on (those that don't read fanfic, make/like fanart, peruse forums and whatnot).

[–] SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.ml 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Same lady that signed off on $23.5 billion dollars being sent to Ukraine instead of supporting disabled people in Canada. Here’s a Substack article about this, people are attacking Nora for it but she’s right.

[–] SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.ml 11 points 1 month ago

Canada’s response to the US bombing Venezuela was as lukewarm as one can get, stating that they hate Maduro’s “criminal regime” and boasting about sanctions while also saying that he US should follow international law. Canadians are just hoping to not b officially annexed, some even want to join the US so there’s that. It’s a weird ass country.

[–] SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.ml 12 points 1 month ago (8 children)

“Sissy men?” What do they mean 😭

[–] SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.ml 8 points 1 month ago

I feel like Canadians will not handle a bird flu pandemic well considering how people reacted to the culling of an Ostrich farm in BC due to the presence of avian flu.

Canadian chud media went insane framing this culling as an evil act by the government when it was unfortunately necessary due to the threat that this virus causes.

If the government tries to enforce a bird flu pandemic protocol then I am sure people will go as insane as they did during COVID’s initial phases.

[–] SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.ml 4 points 1 month ago

Portuguese (my family) people do lol

[–] SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.ml 33 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I believe they got hate before but it really exploded when they exposed that the Democrats were paying TikTok creators to spread good PR without disclosing that they were, in fact, being paid to do so. This made many people come out to attack them and it just never stopped. Now that they know Madeline exists they attack everything she says. The most recent discourse has been about Madeline’s defence of the DPRK.

She called out a leftist creator because he was supporting state department propaganda about the DPRK and now everybody is running around claiming that Madeline said that this guy was directly killing North Koreans when what she was actually saying is that he was contributing to USA state lies that harm the North. This shit will never stop and thankfully Madeline has thick skin.

[–] SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.ml 30 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I’m so glad you said this because i have had this thought for so long. Just read the comments on Canadian social media, I swear it’s more fascistic than USAmericans. It’s really bad up here.

 

This happened last night at my cousin’s housewarming party. I have a very rocky relationship with a good chunk of family, unknowing to them as I try to keep my ire internal as I am unable to live independently from them right now (grad school should help with this). This means that when family events happen I usually have to be there despite being a grown ass man. I could refuse but they get huffy and ask questions if I do not show up, I also live with the matriarch of the family (my grandmother) which makes avoidance very difficult.

Usually when these get togethers happen I can only hope and pray to the universe that anything history or politics related will not come up as most of my family is very uneducated about these topics. This wouldn't be a problem if they weren’t so viscerally resistant to being corrected. I usually sound like a huge jerk when I write my posts here, but I swear I am a lot kinder in real life, I am a bit of a black sheep in my family due to my shyness and habit of dimming myself for other people’s comfort. Every time I have attempted to correct a family member on something they get completely wrong I just end up getting yelled at or argued with. I hav tried various tones: sickeningly sweet, neutral, sarcastic, angry, and flippant but nothing sticks. In the end I am always seen as the instigator, the problem child, because it is best for me to just let them talk shit. I always saw this attitude as cultural but it may just be a my-family-thing (specifically my mother’s side for some reason).

So let’s talk about the party. As you can imagine, while the night was actually going pretty well someone just had to bring up Cuba. It wasn’t even bad at first, my young aunt was just talking about the hurricane and typhoon. First she mentioned the typhoon affecting the Philippines, and then pivoted to the hurricane that has destroyed Jamaica and Cuba. My young aunt expressed sympathy for Jamaica but said that she mostly feels bad for Cuba as it is “a communist country with nothing.” My transphobic aunt (my mother and young aunt’s sister, so a different woman) piped up saying that Cuba got what it deserved because of “everything they’ve done.” No specifics were given, I would bet my entire bank account that she doesn’t even know what the fuck communism is.

My young aunt sort of came to the defence of Cuba, stating that everyone has their side to the story and that the Cubans got screwed over by the Americans. She then said that “we have our version but when you actually talk to Cubans you get a different picture. I am not talking about the leaders!” My transphobic aunt then responded to this “yeah all these leaders think they can do what they want, they do not help the people.” My young aunt then said something about how all leaders are bad and I could only think “what are you, an anarchist?”

Anyway, my young aunt then started to talk about the vacation she took to Cuba however long ago and how one shop owner didn’t even want to accept money from her and her husband (my uncle). All they wanted were clothes. I guess my young aunt gave clothes and the Cuban shop owner ended up burning their names onto something? It was hard to follow as I was lowkey dissociating at this point (this happens often when I am around my family).

My transphobic aunt proceeded to go on a tirade about how liberals are the problem in our world and people like Carney think they know what’s best and that the people are suffering. Mind you, she hates Mark Carney because he isn’t an explicit racist and transphobe. She doesn't care about anyone but herself. She hates immigrants (despite her own mother, my grandma, and sister, my mom, being immigrants. Also my damn dad too!) and anyone who isn’t white. She will deny it but everyone she complains about is non-white, she hardly talks shit unless said white person is transgender. It’s one of the reasons why I have not come out to most of the family (only very few cousins know I am trans).

I got up from the table at this point and walked as far away as I could, but I could still hear them so I just put in one earbud and decided right then and there that I would walk home (its five minutes tops but I am fast walker so it’d probably be shorter). I grabbed my jacket and bag and proceeded to tell my grandma that I was going home because I was tired and the dog needed to eat (this was true).

Since this was around 8:30pm, which means it was quite dark outside (daylight savings), she was not happy that I would attempt this and said she would walk home with me. That was when one of my cousins (the one who drove us here) said she would drop us off. I was not thrilled as I just wanted to be alone but I just accepted it. As I was getting my shoes on at the front door my mom came to hug me goodbye and asked “maybe you could come back after feeding Cory?” I deadpanned looked at her and in the flattest, no-nonsense tone, said “no.” She smiled knowingly, laughing a little, and said “I know.” I got another hug of sympathy and I headed home.

My mom was there for the whole conversation as she was sitting next to me at the table. But she, like me, did not say anything as she is very non-confrontational and does not like to stir the pot no matter how much her sister (transphobic aunt) pisses her off. This whole fiasco made me lose my goddamn mind, and maybe its the BPD but I wanted to fly off the handle but was, for some reason, able to keep my anger to myself. Sometimes when I interact with certain family members I just end up hating myself. It fucking sucks.

And I can’t say anything to them or I will automatically end up being the bad guy because I am young, so therefore inexperienced and thus have nothing of value to say. This obviously does not apply to every family member, as I have been careful to mention that it is very particular people, but these specific individuals also have the most “power” in my family. They are allowed to do and say whatever they want but if someone else does the same or something way more tame, suddenly we’re the devil. I know that me saying nothing is liberalism (I really internalized what Mao said in Combat Liberalism) but family is complicated especially when you rely on them still. The only things that allows me to sleep at night is that I never give them the satisfaction of my approval, and I can talk shit with one of my cousins (she unfortunately wasn’t there last night) and my mom. But I know it is not enough, one day I will be more active but right now I have to play it safe.

Grad school cannot come soon enough (I want that grant money!)…

Edit for clarity: the transphobic aunt is not the same aunt I got into a screaming match with over Israel. That one was my great-aunt, but she and this transphobic aunty share the exact same views when it comes to immigration, trans people, and whatever the fuck else.

 

What is this?!

 

Only two courses were uploaded to the school website place, but by reading the syllabi for each course my heart is pounding.

This is the first semester where I will be taking a seminar course, as I am in my final year. I went over the requirements and it is asking a lot from someone with horrible anxiety. It may sound silly but I have written time and time again about how hard speaking in class and presenting is for me, even asking a question or having to converse with another student makes my bones ache. I do not know why this happens but maybe it is my body tensing up for a fight or to bolt.

My other class is the last political science class I will be taking, thank god, and it is about civil war. While going through that syllabus I quickly noticed just how much is being assigned and graded. Not only do I have two quizzes, I also have to make my own quizzes based off the lecture and reading materials. Furthermore we will be made to do peer reviews, self assessments, and a whole presentation plus the research paper at the end of the semester. Thankfully the quizzes and the peer reviews are all anonymous so we have no idea who wrote what quiz and which paper we are critiquing.

I tend to overreact a lot, last semester when I read the syllabus I had a whole breakdown crying to my mom on the phone, so I feel like this is what is happening again and I will probably be fine after communicating with my professors and actually seeing how the class works in person. But even so my anxiety is not going away. I guess I am writing here because I was hoping to know if anyone has felt similarly to me, or can give me some insight into how these higher level courses work because I feel very worried I am not built for this, but I want to be.

Sorry for the anxious rant. I do look forward to continuing the chronicles starting tomorrow.

 

Before I get into it, I promise I will not hound my mother with information that she does not want nor will my resources be unprompted. I only ever talk to her about this stuff when she brings it up herself.

For a while now I have noticed my mother becoming more and more… based? As in I do not even have to say anything explicitly and she will just do it herself. For example, a few days ago when we were heading to her place (as I was housesitting for the weekend) we were talking about how scared I was to cross a particular street for my bus due to the traffic being a nightmare in my city (it is a light-less crosswalk which means cars can do whatever they want and are very impatient, thus it is very anxiety inducing). She affirmed my fears and began to talk about how if our public transit system was more efficient and better funded then the roads would be way less congested and many people wouldn't feel the need to drive, she even brought up fifteen minute cities! All of this was done without my guidance.

She under values her own intelligence a lot, and jokes that I have to “dumb down” information for her (I do not, I just use words that she would understand) but she is absorbing what I say and is applying it without my aid. I am incredibly proud of her, but she does have a weak point: the Tsar.

While I was at her house and talking about history she brought up how she loves history too. She always had ever since I could remember, but her interest purely lies in that of royalty. She mainly watches TV shows and dramatized movies that centre on European monarchs. For the most part she feels little to no sympathy for their fates as they really had it coming, what with the extreme wealth inequality. But she told me that the one that really sticks with her is the Tsar, it was so tragic.

I made a face and she pointed it out so I just told her that what the Tsar did was worse than his own fate, and that they deserved it. I wasn’t aggressive in my tone either. She pushed back that her sympathy mostly lied with the children, I countered that most of them were already adults at the time. She responded that most of them were women and thus had no power so their deaths were pointless.

The conversation kind of ended there and we moved on to something else. This was not an argument and our tones were light. But this is something I have heard her repeat a lot and I do not know how to go about it when it comes up again. My mom is not one for reading historical books, she just doesn't really have the time to sit and read novels, even the dramatized ones. But she likes TV shows and movies.

Are there any that can tell a more accurate story of the Tsar, something that is less documentary-like and more narrative? I do not know the names of the movies and shows she watches but I know they act like fictional media while telling a “true” story, if that makes sense. I just want something to recommend to her that will be entertaining and also enlightening. I wish the history she watched focused on the people rather than the rulers of the time, but thats where we are right now and I have to work with it.

 

I was watching a TikTok live of a fellow comrade and saw a message in the chat by “user bunch-of-numbers” that said MAGA Communism was the future.

I, stupidly, responded “no it isn’t, come on now.” I did so because I wanted to shut that shit down immediately but that only spurred him on. I should’ve known better.

He responded with “yes it is, you are a rad lib.”

Notice how he insulted me first? So in turn I responded “MAGA communism is not the future, you’re a weirdo conservative.” While I usually keep the insults in my mind and try to stay level headed, I felt comfortable matching energy because he called me a fucking radlib.

He then continued “most of the American proletariat are Trumpers and we need to reach them.”

I said “yes, the working class should be reached but not while validating their bigotries.” I believe that you have to meet people where they are at, mostly regarding education such as not using unfamiliar words or concepts, while NOT validating their hatred of minorities.

He countered “Stalin and the Red Army defeated Hitler, not blue haired multigenders.” I shit you not, this is what he said. I never specified what bigotry I was talking about since MAGA people embody them all, but he seemed to get really defensive over my statement.

I then asked “because most trumpers are incredibly racist, does that make their racism okay then?” Since he seems to be fine with homophobia and transphobia, that must mean he is okay with racism too.

He stated “most of them aren’t racist, but the ones who are of course it is not okay.”

With that I said “okay, well are blue haired multigenders not also proletariat?”

And I swear to god he said “most of them are not. Baristas are not proletariat.”

Who the fuck brought up baristas? Not me! With that I asked “what makes queer people not proletariat?”

And guess what? He stopped responding and just continued talking to others in the chat and repeating that MAGA communism was the future.

I know I should have just ignored his ass but I just couldn’t. I am the type that cannot let that shit slide, because when I do I end up feeling awful physically (achy knees for some reason) and mentally.

 

Hi comrades,

My professor emailed me today talking about how he is on tenure track and is now under review to extend his path to tenure. This is a normal process and part of it that would help the review committee is getting letters of experiences from students. He gave me a list of things that I should mention which I will when I write it (my experiences with his lectures, impact on my academics, anything specific that he helped with, etc.).

My only issue, and it’s not really an issue, is that I’ve never done anything like this before and was wondering if anyone else had had this experience and would be willing to share some tips on how to go about this. Even if you’ve never had to do an academic support letter I would still appreciate any advice.

Is there a way I should structure this? Do I address the committee? They have no official name, just the “review committee,” so should I start by saying something like “dear Review Committee”?

I was told that not writing a letter would not impact my grades or professional relationship with my professor, but I want to do it as it’s great practice for me and I want the committee to know just how great this professor is.

Thanks for your help!

 

During my summer break after completing my spring classes I decided to try to do a few activities: learning Russian, dog training, housesitting, and finally finishing Rise of the Tomb Raider. This game is the second of the survivor trilogy and it left an odd taste in my mouth.

The first of this trilogy, just called Tomb Raider, came out in 2013 and it as the first Tomb Raider game I had ever played, although I knew of the series already from the movies and just the games existing. I played it religiously on my Xbox and was practically in love with this version of Lara Croft. I was a young teen back then, and now that I am an adult I finally have my own resources to buy the rest of the survivor trilogy: Rise of the Tomb Raider and Shadow of the Tomb Raider. The reason why I am writing a post about Rise is because of its setting, plot, and tropes.

When I was sifting through the DLC I noticed an outfit called “Siberian Ranger,” this got me thinking that maybe the game would be set somewhere in Russia, obviously in Siberia. I was right. Immediately I was cautious and even a bit worried but I played through trying to keep a realistic amount of optimism that hopefully the game wouldn’t succumb to Russophobia, or god forbid any anti-Soviet sentiment if there was anything related to the USSR. Well imagine my surprise when a good chunk of the game is spent exploring and raiding old Soviet installations and even a small Gulag. I was extremely hesitant but pushed forward and once again hoped that the game would be at the very least neutral towards the Soviets. At first I thought I was right.

When I first came across the Soviet installations, a logging camp and mine, things were fairly okay. There were crests everywhere to read, increasing Russian language proficiency, and when she would read them Lara would make a comment like “Soviet propaganda,” or “more propaganda,” in which she would then read it out loud. Her tone was neutral or intrigued, but most of the crests would talk about working through nights and hunger, some even gave hope of freedom through work (sound familiar?). The only one that was fine was a crest saying “Lenin Lived, Lenin Lives, Lenin will live forever.” If you want to see what all the crests said in detail then just search up “Rise of the Tomb Raider soviet crests” and there will be a fandom wiki where it lists all of them including Lara’s comments.

With these crests and as you proceed through the Soviet areas things get worse pretty quickly. The Soviets are depicted as having been brutal invaders who treated their prisoners incredibly poorly. They would enslave innocent Natives, including women and children, entire families, for the purpose of building their railway, digging in the mines, and competing with the West. As you explore the logging camp there are sleeping areas for the prisoners in which every bed is caged in. I do not mean prison cells, I mean every bunk had caged walls, so prisoners would be essentially entombed in their bed until released to work their lives away. Again, the Natives are described as innocent, they committed no real crimes yet the Soviets imprisoned them anyway.

Not all prisoners were Natives and this is talked about in documents left by the Soviets and Natives. It builds a narrative of a growing resistance movement to overthrow the oppressive Reds, and this rebellion was successful as proven by the corpses of soviet soldiers strewn around, all skeletons in uniforms. When you enter the area with train cars and a large building you have to scale, fighting a million enemies as it burns to the ground, the entrance gate has Soviet skeletons hanging on it as a grim form of decoration or message, most likely strung up by the prisoners.

The gulag is small and not nearly as terrible as Lara narrates it as. This sounds horrible for me to say but it was mainly just a bunch of wooden buildings encased in barbed wire fence. Lara is captured by the main bad guys, Trinity, and is imprisoned there with a Native named Jacob. Lara and Jacob manage to escape together and while making their way through the gulag Jacob will narrate how his people were treated so poorly by the invading Soviets and now by Trinity, making parallels between the two. While he talks you can turn on a slide show that shows a bunch of photos taken at the gulag, in which Jacob will continue on about the horrors his people faced. They really push this idea of the Soviets being ruthless colonizers. Just like Trinity.

Trinity is a weird cult/organization that has existed since ancient times. They are hyper religious and were hunting down a prophet, an immortal man that defied the rules of their God. The Natives talked about and encountered through the game are followers of this immortal prophet. The prophet is immortal due to this thing called the Divine Source, something the Natives, also called the Remnant, will protect fiercely. The Soviets were not privy to this Divine Source until later and by that point the Remnant wiped them out. Trinity is also after the Source and Lara has to stop them. I explain Trinity’s whole deal to show who the game is comparing the Soviets to. It’s not great.

Like its predecessor, Rise has optional challenges that can be completed for EXP. Two of these challenges are called “Capture the Flag” and “Difference of Opinion.” The flag challenge has to do with the many USSR flags strewn around the installation. The point of the challenge is to cut down every Soviet flag found, this can only be done once finding the knife. The opinion challenge has to do with Soviet propaganda posters hanging up on walls everywhere, many depicting cosmonauts and Lenin. The challenge is completed by burning all the posters, this can be done with Molotov cocktails and/or fire arrows. These are just more forms of anticommunism that plague this game.

Now, why did I mention the noble savage trope in the title? Because the Remnant, also known as the Natives, somewhat embody this trope in the way they are framed against the technologically “superior” Trinity and Soviets. The Remnant themselves do not use any form of modern technology, except radios, and they do not wear modern clothes either except for Jacob, their leader. Now this is not an issue, I know people in real life subscribe to this, living without much of modern tech and that is fine. It is the way this is juxtaposed against the antagonists, people who the Soviets are compared to, where the trope becomes more evident. Not only that, but they are not specific at all. Notice how they are only called the Natives? They have no real resemblance to any native Siberian group at all.

The Remnant are confusing as well in their origins as they seem to be from Syria, but their documents and other collectibles are in Greek. The ancient Remnant collectibles are in Mongolian, but I do not recall any Remnant documents in Russian. The only real flaw to the Remnant is that they are initially hostile to Lara’s existence but rely on her heavily once she proves to be an ally against Trinity. It is odd to me how they are shown to be opposites of the Soviets, not being able to work together. They are opposing forces, an oppressor that must be defeated.

More can be somewhat learned about the relationship between the Soviets and remnant in the Baba Yaga DLC. This DLC follows three people: Nadia, her grandpa Ivan, and grandmother Serafima who is supposed to be dead, but spoiler alert grandma is actually Baba Yaga. Ivan is a ex-Soviet soldier who fell in love with one of the prisoners, Serafima, and runs away with her. That does not last as she is taken and killed by Baba Yaga. Ivan makes a vow to get vengeance and heads off to kill Baba Yaga, because he is missing Nadia asks Lara for help in finding him and defeating the witch. The game treats Baba Yaga as her mythological, supernatural form, as Lara suffers from hallucinations brought on by pollen from a flower.

You get to fight some pretty cool battles because of these drug trips. One of the fights you have to survive a bunch of spooky wolves while Baba Yaga commands the area with her walking house. A house that is revealed to just be a gondola. Long story short you find an antidote for the drug trips but are unable to take another dose before the final battle thus having to fight the witch in her floating cauldron. The witch is revealed to be Serafima, who was a researcher enslaved by the Soviets to conduct, well, research. Serafima details severe abuse dealt out by the Soviets against the prisoners, her included, and she decides to use the hallucinogenic pollen against them. She also attacks because she believed the Soviets killed her husband. Her diaries that can be found detail all of this and it was just more of the same “Soviets are evil” stuff. Nothing new from what the game has given thus far.

The game itself was fine in terms of mechanics and gameplay. It felt similar to the first but the story was lacklustre. Maybe my judgement is clouded by the anti-Soviet sentiment sewn through its narrative, but I do not seem to be the only one who felt the same. I was interested in the beginning, regarding the Syrian campaign (a brief flashback tomb raid, but it was fun) and the history of the prophet and ancient trinity, but it just got super boring once exploring the Soviet installation and the rest of the Siberian wilderness. The beginning was, again, interesting, especially that first bear fight and stealth killing trinity goons in the forest, but it just dragged on as the game continued.

The tropes were annoyingly obvious and decisions made by characters were frustrating, drawing out an already predictable story. The side-quests weren’t even that good either. What saved it for me was those beginning areas of gameplay, the mystery (at first), the tombs, exploration (in some areas), and the final boss fight. I actually dealt the final blow with a tin can. You are able to craft them into an explosive but instead of that I just threw it at the guy and he died in the most dramatic way possible. It was hilarious.

I still love Tomb Raider from a gameplay view and it has honestly inspired me to work out. I want to be able to shoot arrows, fight, and climb things like Lara. I know it is probably silly that a video game makes me want to get more active but it gives me a “tangible” goal to work towards which is something I need. I wanna be tomb raider without the raiding because that is unethical as hell. Also, as someone who is working towards becoming a Historian (I do not feel comfortable calling myself one just yet), the actual history that is found in these games, through the artifacts found, is really nice.

In conclusion, I am glad I finished this game and I look forward to Shadow of the Tomb Raider, the final instalment of the survivor trilogy.

 

I am aware that this is a silly question, it’s stupid, really.

This has to do with a provincial government, not the feds. If you know anything about disability politics in Canada then you are probably aware of the Canadian Disability Benefit that was recently rolled out. This is a federal program that is supposed to give those on provincial disability programs a $200 “top-up” on the already existing provincial cheque. The federal government did not think this decision through incredibly well, or maybe they did, because they specified that the provinces could treat this extra $200 how ever they pleased but “encouraged” that the money be exempt from any cut backs.

Because of this, my province (I do not care if I am doxing myself at this point) is slashing $200 from their own disability cheques. So instead of an extra 200, we would be getting the same amount of money before the CDB went into effect. Moreover, the CDB is not automatically applied to people on these provincial programs, instead we have to apply by ourselves, but the process is a pain in the ass because before we can even attempt to apply to the CDB we have to be approved for the Disability Tax Credit, which, once again, is not automatically applied. To even apply for the DTC you need a doctor to sign off on it and it costs $250.

The easy solution would just be to not apply for the CDB, but here’s the thing, my province is FORCING us to apply to it, and if we do not notify them of our application process by September 5th they are going to claw-back the $200 anyway regardless of whether we have been approved for the CDB or not.

This all sounds incredibly unethical, right? So what can I do about it? I have been trying to call my disability program to get answers but apparently they are getting a very high number of calls (no shit, I wonder why) and I haven’t been able to speak to anyone regarding what I can do and what will happen if I refuse to go through with my CDB application. I wanted to contact the feds about this gross misuse of federal funding but apparently they wont do anything because they are allowing the provinces to do whatever they want, so far it seems only my province is clawing-back benefits. Not only are benefits being reduced, but rent is also going to skyrocket as well (a deliberate policy choice by the provincial government). This is just another example of the provinces having too much power.

I’ve seen people use the legal system to get things done but I do not know if that is something that I would be able to do. After trying to keep it together for so long since I got that stupid letter in the mail I have finally had a breakdown today. I hate this government and I want to fight back but I do not know how.

I wish my grandparents never immigrated here…

 

And I totally forgot. I literally woke up this morning confused as hell with all the texts I was getting from family, when I unlocked my phone I saw all the “Happy Birthday” messages and realized I am a year older today!

I know we aren’t supposed to reveal our ages but I will say that I am not yet 30 but it’ll be really cool once I get there.

My spring/summer semester is also over which means I am free until September so thats nice. My male dog also started on fluoxetine for his terrible anxiety, so hopefully he does well. Overall I am trying to stay chill and happy now that a new year has started for me, from today I will finally have time to start up on my Russian language lessons too.

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