I'm a unionized nurse and basically I'm on an unenforceable PIP because management simply wrote what I, according to them, do wrong and gave me the filled form, but without conducting an interview with me, the union wasn't contacted and they even didn't ask me to sign it. Union already told me this is not enforceable.

There are union representatives and union representatives: the one who feels a job is a job told me to calm down and keep applying for jobs elsewhere if I so decide, not asking for a 2 month 'reprieve' to be better at a job most days I don't want to do anymore (working bedside with difficult patients).

The other union representative who still considers nursing a calling but works with compliant patients (pediatrics), told me the hospital can fire me if I don't ask for a meeting with management to ask how I can be better and that only after being better I should apply for jobs elsewhere (which I call BS).

I'm still undecided about how to play this, but I sure want to quit bedside. If playing theatrics and pretending I have an interest in becoming a person they consider a better nurse helps me quit this job, even if the PIP is unenforceable, I'm playing this game.

Except that my first impulse to the question if I like my job would be a 5 minute rant about non compliant patients, stupid family members working against you, people calling for you to refill their water when they can walk, being blamed for things I cannot control, bad ratios, having to get up at 04:00 to get to work, having to work nights, listening to my coworkers talk about their holidays in the middle of report, drama...

So, how do I become a better liar to the tune of: I want to keep working here, I like what I do, I like seeing patients leave healthy and independent to live their lives... until I find a job I like more?