Top screenshot and [left] transcript are real and verbatim from Sept 4 broadcast on national TV.
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Who the fuck doesn’t drink a milkshake with a straw?
Are all these strawless non-gay heterosexual manly men walking around with milk mustaches like 5 year olds? Is this what women are into?
No, these strawless, non-gay, heterosexual, manly men are just like me. They were handed a spoon, but not a straw in the drive through and they decided to just drive off rather than bother or inconvenience someone, even though it wouldn't be a bother or inconvenience, it's the person's job, and they'd be happy to help. I am married though, so while I wouldn't say my wife is specifically attracted to that brand of social awkwardness, she's not entirely repulsed by it.
I feel comfortable answering that last question!
No
Weird people.
<.<
I really prefer my milkshakes at the level of 'the-straw-barely-closes-when-you-suck-so-you-gotta-use-a-spoon' but not to the firmness of ice cream itself.
So... me?