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this post was submitted on 01 Aug 2023
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Men's Liberation
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I know that anecdotes are bad quality evidence, but there’s a hell of a lot of anecdotal data that sex tastes have changed over the last 60 years. Are there alternative theories about what caused it?
Every part of culture has changed over the last 60 years. Why would sex be any different?
Well for one, it’s mostly private, so there isn’t as much group think about it. I don’t know if it’s changed historically as much as it recently has, but that’s an interesting area to research
How do you think they 've changed? It could very easily be society being more open to discussing sexual tastes compared to 60 years ago.
Frankly? Way too much oversharing with friends of all ages. That’s why it’s anecdotal, but it’s even changed in my time having sex. It’s just not something that I’ve seen studied by someone other than Christian mom groups.
So it's not actually the sexual 'tastes' that have changed but society's willingness to speak about them?
Even if so, what is exactly the problem with sex tastes changing?
I’m not sure there is one, but it’s a sign that porn would be impacting us as a population.
Or it could be millions of other things. The biggest being less societal pressure on individual preferences and women gaining much more agency in society.
Maybe 🤷 I suspect porn’s role is non zero, but it’s not exactly easy to study without a population that doesn’t really use porn while allowing for individuality and personal rights.
Not much different from a lot of other social studies. You often have problems with covariables and control groups. You need good studies design and robust statistics.
Because things like choking someone almost to death, or getting choked are concerning expressions of a damaged psyche. Also unrealistic expectations can cause more frustration on both ends, were people feel unable to meet these expectations and people fail to realize their expectations to be unrealistic.
So in all we could see a development of people having less sex, having less enjoyable sex and using sex to cope with serious mental issues instead of getting help, while society is ignoring problematic soxietal developments by shoving them into sexuality and declaring it as just being liberated kinkyness.
None of these are absolutes and there is many positive changes happening too, but we need to understand sex tastes and sex behaviour to be a reflection of individuals and society, where problems will also show that we need to adress
I see you are a friend of bold claims with nothing to back them up. But I would encourage you to read Marquis de Sade if you think we are getting too Kinky. What I see is humans being less afraid to try out and live out their sexual fantasies and therefore having a more full filling sex life.
You misunderstood me then. Nowhere did i say it is bad or good. I said it needs to be understood as a mirror of people and their society and the underlying issues need to understood.
But yes there is limits to kinkyness. Some years back a guy got convicted because he strangled a woman to death during initially consensual SM sex. He claimed it easnt intentional. He tried to argue in court that sex and death belong together and they found more than 1000 porn videos in his computers with women being killed during sex. If we get to that, then it went too far.
So wich one is it, did we go too far or is it neither good or bad?
There is no issue, people have Kinky fantasy, just read some older sex fiction. Even classics as Anaïs Nin can be rather dark. We are just less suppressed by societal norms and are able to share them more freely. And if someone has a problem of separating fiction, fantasy and reality - that is a whole other story, but Salinger is not responsible for Lennons death.
The development in its entirety is neither good or bad, but it needs to be understood, as to why such fringe cases occur.
Is it so hard to understand that the world isnt just black or white?
Sex related violence did not occure before? What development are you talking about? People being more open about their sexual fantasies?
You are the one who is bringing judgment in - so why are you asking me?