this post was submitted on 25 May 2025
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Hello!

Making this post to check in on other asexual spectrum people. Curious how attraction works for you?

Recently discovered the term "side" and feel that fits well. Always felt obligated for penetrative sex, liked servicing but awkward when things done to me.

Been with men and women. Recently with someone could not be more my type but could not perform. Twice. Wanted to (or so I thought) but it was wanting to be a people pleaser.

When it clicked. Dont like sex. Enjoy things around it, watching partner reactions,kissing, cuddling, performing oral, but actual? It feels like pulling teeth.

Searched and searched and this seems to be a hard Google. 🤷

What prompted me to make this post.

Asexual people what has been your journey of self acceptance? How does attraction works for you? How have partners been about understanding it?

Thanks for the responses.

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[–] reactionality 1 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

Not liking sex, aka being asexual, doesn't fit into the Venn diagram of sexual preferences.

It is outside of the set. It's not even comparable since it's just axiomatically different.

So placing asexuals within the LGBT+ group also makes no sense.

Drop the victim behaviour, it's just straight up logic which you fail to understand.

I say this because you posted to the LGBTQ+ community.

[–] Witchfire@lemmy.world 1 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

Counterpoint: I'm ace, trans, and gay. There are dozens of us.

They're allowed to be here. Asexuality is just as stigmatized. Intersectionality only makes us stronger.