Trying to put down in words what it feels like taking Vyvanse for the first time as an adult diagnosed after 30.
After years of trying other treatments, therapy, non-stimulant medications, I’ve got my first prescription for a stimulant and today is my first time taking it. I was always wondering what would it feel like so I think I’d try to describe it:
After the initial physical sensation subsided (stiff feeling in the neck, jaw, a feeling like tension on the skin of the back of the head) and I’ve started my work day I’ve realized that I’m pretty much feeling calm. Like there was a race in the back of my head where each task was fighting for a priority and I was trying to accommodate the first one that came to mind, but now while the race is still there I can just methodically pick one out and focus on it for a bit, or switch to another while still remembering the first one. It feels almost mechanical in how calm the process is (maybe a bit too mechanical actually), and I feel less governed by emotion.
I’m still getting distracted, but it seems like distractions last much less and I don’t feel panic and urgency after returning to the task at hand.
Now I wonder what it feels like once the effect is over, and if I will be able to sleep tonight normally.
One other effect is that there is almost no hunger, so I had to remind myself to eat something. In that regard it feels similar to hyperfocus when I’m absorbed in a task and forget to eat anything. I don’t know if it’s actually bad since I do have enough weight that needs losing, but I also don’t want an eating disorder. Feels like I need to start planning my meals.
I was also diagnosed as an adult and prescribed Vyvanse and I’ve been taking it for a few years now. The first couple of months, while I was still getting the dose right, were the hardest. The worst bit was mood swings when the dose was a bit too high, for a day or two at a time everything seemed to be bleak, then I’d wake up the next morning and everything was fine again. The appetite loss didn’t last (unfortunately), my body seems to have compensated.
I have set reminders in my phone to take my meds at the same time every day because consistency seems to be important, reducing side-effects and letting me plan my day around when I will be most productive.
I’m now two thirds of the way through getting a degree, which would never have been possible pre-medication. I did try when I was younger and ended up dropping out of university twice and college a couple of times too. Now, even though I still need to push myself to open the books sometimes, when I do I can actually focus and find getting into that flow state so much easier.