this post was submitted on 23 May 2026
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some of these things are getting out of hand for sure. one wedding I was invited to also involved a "couple's shower" a few weeks prior. this being the first time I'd heard of such a thing, I asked someone else involved what the hell a couple's shower is. they told me, it's a party where the friends and family of a couple get together with food and gifts to celebrate the upcoming marriage. I asked, isn't that called a wedding?
I imagine it's a replacement for a bachelor/bachelorette party.
I had that and a wedding, but no gifts were expected at either. The reason we did that is because a traditional wedding tends to be very planned and formal with not enough time to just hang out. We wanted the traditional wedding pictures and ceremony, but we had family and friends coming in from around the world just for a few days so we had a few events to see people as much as possible. I think it was well received, but again, no gifts were expected. We didn't post a registry and told people that we just wanted them to make it.
Maybe it's for people who want to celebrate their marriage with their closest friends and family but feel obligated to do the big, traditional wedding, so they do both.
I get it. I would only want maybe a dozen people at my wedding, so I just didn't have one.