Off My Chest

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Today I hosted a barbeque... to noone (lemmy.world)

submitted 16 hours ago by Gonzako@lemmy.world to c/goodoffmychest@lemmy.world

36 comments fedilink hide all child comments

So today was meant to be the day was gonna invite a group of people to a small gathering at my house. I made a silly website that'd show all the info and i'd go around personally inviting them.

I think they just liked the idea of being invited more than the event itself. I had around 10 people explicitly tell to my face that they were coming.

Noone followed through.

I probably fucked up somewhere in the process but it hurts nonetheless; It was the first event I had organized for a group. I wanted to share my world with the people around me. I wanted to showcase my dogs and my garden.

At least i've learned something, I got to cook some meat for my family. But damn, this feels isolating.

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[–] nocturne@slrpnk.net 67 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

For my son's 2nd birthday we invited all of the kids from day care, ask of my friend's kids, basically anyone we knew with a kid to the party. One woman and her son showed up. I made so much food, I stupidly spend far more money than we could afford for this thing.

I know how you feel friend. Hope your weekend gets better.

[–] aln@lemmy.world 16 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

That sucks, sorry your plan didn't work out. Since it's a 2nd birthday party, did you plan it around a nap time? Toddlers at that age are quite temperamental, and it takes a lot of effort/changing their day to attend a party that's anywhere from 11am-4pm. That's the only reason I can think of that might cause people to ghost you last minute.

However, I'm also not above sending a message to everyone who RSVPd yes and explaining to them what it is they did. Just being like "hey, when you RSVP yes, we're actively including you and people we expect to come with you in our plans. Please respect our time, effort, money, and also your decency as a human being by adequately replying to the RSVP."

I'm also not above burning bridges so uhh YMMV if you go that route.

It could also be a case of each individual person thinking that they individually won't be missed, hoping that there'll be plenty of other people there anyway.

[–] nocturne@slrpnk.net 13 points 13 hours ago

It was over 18 years ago, I have no idea what time we planned it. All the invites and replies were by hand.

It was not my first kid, so I am well aware of nap time. Also we never missed a party we said we would attend because it was nap time.