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Reddit's community, as in the whole, feels like it plays by some unwritten rules where straying just a bit from those causes maximum persecution. And though I understand each platform has a culture, including here on the fediverse, Reddit's I don't feel like culture either.
About adressing your fediverse concerns, I second the idea of curating your experience by blocking, subscribing, and manually looking the community list as needed. Furthermore, I'd also suggest keeping an eye on where the posts that cause you to be annoyed come from, since those not uncommonly come from the same places.
I just noticed that Lemmy defaults to showing you a feed of all local communities when you open the homepage instead of subscriptions. There doesn't seem to be a way to change that. I'm bombarded with the ragebait and doomerism that suffuses typical Lemmy discourse as soon as I open the homepage, and I have to click a button to tell the server "now show me what I actually want to see".
Yes I know you can block communities, but maintaining a list of blocked instances, comms, and users feels like playing a game of whack-a-mole. If people here were more chill I might feel differently, but the rage shows up in the weirdest places you'd never expect, and not even in an organic way.
It's such a tiny change, but I think defaulting to showing a user's subscriptions rather than the local feed, only falling back to local if the user isn't signed in or if the user has no subscriptions, would make a huge difference.
Your Lemmy is not like mine. You needed to go into your preferences/settings and sort (no pun intended) it out.
You also need to block users and instances. For example I have no want to see ‘anime’ bullshit so I block all the instances that seem to dominate that and occasionally you get a user that posts some but might be on an instance that you don’t want to block so I just block the user.
About defaulting to subscriptions, there actually is a way through the settings:
Ani.Social being a Lemmy instance.
Also sadly that requires having an account. Also, PieFed iirc has curated feeds, something Lemmy copying wouldn't be half bad, I think.
ah I see, thanks.