this post was submitted on 21 Dec 2025
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You can just ask people out. In my youth I wasted a lot of time pining for people. Then one of my friends was like "just ask them out. If they say no, move on".
More broadly, just ask for what you need. Waiting for other people to guess stinks.
See also: ask vs guess culture. Short Guardian article on it: https://archive.is/GBZBf
(I know some people are guessers and will claim it works for them, but everyone I know who is a guesser has a lot of pain from waiting for people to guess or people guessing wrong.)