this post was submitted on 06 Feb 2026
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ADHD

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It's not easy to describe but here goes. If I'm doing something for someone (the dishes, cooking a meal, tidying up, decorating a Xmas tree) and they don't know I'm doing it, then I hear them approaching (keys in the front door, the sound of someone getting out of bed upstairs) and I get a huge panicky feeling because if they discover me before I've finished it and they:

1 - Thank me 2 - Don't approve of what I've done 3 - Try to help me 4 - Change what I'm trying to do like "Oh thanks but there's a better table cloth in the cupboard. Here lemme get it" 5 - Try to correct what I'm doing

I will lose all motivation and feel immediately depressed cos I missed the big dopamine hit of going "Tadaaa".

I wonder if there's a term for that situation?

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[–] naught@sh.itjust.works 23 points 2 days ago

Check out Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA). Could be related

Plus ADHD fucks up ur ability to muster the energy/intention to do tasks, especially ones you don't want to do already. If I am asked to do something I already intended on doing, it saps the energy from me too.