this post was submitted on 17 Feb 2026
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My guilt comes from a variety of sources: lesbians saying that they don’t care about size (which is perfectly valid), women with big bosoms complaining about the pains that they cause (also valid), and scientists finding a correlation between misogynistic boys and a preference for enormous knockers. I’ve even read that some girls have ended their lives over dissatisfaction with their sizes. Basically, I have this impression that a preference for massive mammaries is something that only ‘trashy straight boys’ have, therefore I feel guilty by association.

That said, I try not to be a jerk either: I don’t shun or mistreat ladies for having small breasts, and I wouldn’t fight tooth and nail to prevent somebody from getting a reduction either. As long as she is happier with her smaller breasts, that’s great! I’m happy for her! And I don’t mind being friends with somebody who has small breasts either! So I like to think that I am not that shallow of a person. Also, maybe this is usual but I tend to associate big boobs with power and I would much rather be dominated by huge honkers than vice versa.

None of this erases my guilt, though.

Is my preference a problem that I should try to fix or am I worrying too much?

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[–] Lobanova@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

But large breasts aren’t dominant, they’re just socially favored, in the same way being tall is. And you gotta make sure you’re looking at the person the boobs are on even while lusting after her.

Yeah, this is another…issue…that I wanted to discuss later. I try not to let my lust override my normal social interactions, and I try not to forget that women are more than just bodies parts…but I have this, uh…weird kink where I am more turned on if I can’t see the receiving lady’s face. There is just something about obsessing over a lady’s other body parts that I find especially arousing, and I can’t explain why.

I feel awful saying it because it really sounds like I get turned on objectifying others, but like I said: I try not to let my fetishes override my normal social interactions; I like to think that I can still wake up from my weird fantasies and treat bathykolpian women like ordinary people again.

Are you gonna have to bonk me now?

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 3 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

That's fair, and I think experience will mold it away from rigid kinks and hard preference to a more holistic and realistic system of desires and understanding of your preferences. At least it did for me. I still have some preferences I began with like big boobs, but the expansion of my tastes has done me wonders, and it's shaped my understanding of my desires into a far more neutral and open minded stance. When I find someone hot I normally wouldn't now I just roll with it, and that makes me far more comfortable finding what normally attracts me hot