I swear I keep making this joke about "Jesus hates this one neat trick to bring the apocalypse!"

Like wtf is wrong with these fundamentalist assholes thinking they can force a massive bloody war to happen and that will somehow trick Jesus to come because they completed some checklist? Are they playing some kind of card game? "Ha! My conditions have been met, I force Jesus to the field! He casts Absolution! We all go to heaven and collect 23 virgins!"

...ffs